Problematic Characters: A NovelSpielhagen, Friedrich
General
Problematic Characters: A Novel
Spielhagen, Friedrich
Fiction
"Do you really wish it, Melitta?"
"You have once more been very kind to me."
"Then it is simply from gratitude?"
"And--friendship."
"Farewell, Melitta!"
"Happy journey, Oldenburg!"
The baron went slowly towards the door; there he stopped, and came back
once more to say:
"Have you always been convinced that I was your friend, Melitta?"
"Yes."
"Have you always been convinced that I loved you?"
Melitta was silent.
"No? Never, at any time?" asked the baron, in a low voice.
"Let us bury the past!"
"No, Melitta, let us speak of it. I may not find another such
opportunity in my life. No, no! For our old friendship, or whatever you
call it, is dead, since I was fool enough to let you see that I loved
you--and there is no bridge to span that abyss. For the moment we are
united by common distress; as soon as I leave this room we shall be
strangers again to each other. Melitta, by our former friendship, by
the memory of our common youth and its happiness, tell me, did you
never believe that I loved you?"
"I do not know----"
"That is hard," said the baron, "that is hard." He sank into a chair,
leaned his arm on the back, and hid his face in his hand.
He rose again, walked up and down with long strides, crossing his arms
on his breast, and said, as if speaking to himself: "Why should men
complain, who love and are loved again, if they are cheated out of
their hopes in one way or another? Why do they complain who love and
are not loved again, but at least have the consolation of seeing that
their grief is respected, and that others pity their suffering? No--to
love, as a son of earth can love, with all his soul, with every drop
of blood in his veins, and then to learn--not that he is not loved
again--pshaw, that is nothing--but that he is looked upon as a
pretender, a mere trifler--ha, ha, ha!--that is real bliss such as is
dealt out to the poor devils who are undergoing torture."
"And if I cannot believe that you love me, who is to blame for it? Who
arranged that scene in the garden of the village Serra di Falco? You or
I?"
"What?" said the baron, stopping suddenly, "are you really such a
novice in love that I must give you an explanation of that farce? Do
you really think that I--who do not easily overlook anything--had not
long since seen you behind the myrtle hedge before I sank at Hortense's
feet and invoked the sun, which had set long ago, and the moon, that
was not shining, and the stars, that knew better, to witness my burning
passion? Could you take that for a moment in earnest?"
"What else?"
"It was an allegory. I wished to show you: See, that is what you will
have left if you refuse me. You force me, who wish to worship a saint,
to seek forgetfulness in the arms of a----. Melitta, Melitta, confess!
You knew perfectly well it was a farce, but you found it convenient to
take it in earnest. You wished to get rid of me, and even at the price
of a misunderstanding!"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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