Psmith in the CityWodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
General
Psmith in the City
Wodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
Humorous stories
Ever since that moment Mr Bickersdyke had felt that there was a silver
lining to the cloud. Hitherto Psmith had left nothing to be desired in
the manner in which he performed his work. His righteousness in the
office had clothed him as in a suit of mail. But now he had slipped. To
go off an hour and a half before the proper time, and to refuse to
return when summoned by the head of his department--these were offences
for which he could be dismissed without fuss. Mr Bickersdyke looked
forward to tomorrow's interview with his employee.
Meanwhile, having enjoyed an excellent dinner, he was now, as Psmith
had predicted, engaged with a cigar and a cup of coffee in the lower
smoking-room of the Senior Conservative Club.
Psmith and Mike entered the room when he was about half through these
luxuries.
Psmith's first action was to summon a waiter, and order a glass of neat
brandy. 'Not for myself,' he explained to Mike. 'For Comrade
Bickersdyke. He is about to sustain a nasty shock, and may need a
restorative at a moment's notice. For all we know, his heart may not be
strong. In any case, it is safest to have a pick-me-up handy.'
He paid the waiter, and advanced across the room, followed by Mike. In
his hand, extended at arm's length, he bore the glass of brandy.
Mr Bickersdyke caught sight of the procession, and started. Psmith set
the brandy down very carefully on the table, beside the manager's
coffee cup, and, dropping into a chair, regarded him pityingly through
his eyeglass. Mike, who felt embarrassed, took a seat some little way
behind his companion. This was Psmith's affair, and he proposed to
allow him to do the talking.
Mr Bickersdyke, except for a slight deepening of the colour of his
complexion, gave no sign of having seen them. He puffed away at his
cigar, his eyes fixed on the ceiling.
'An unpleasant task lies before us,' began Psmith in a low, sorrowful
voice, 'and it must not be shirked. Have I your ear, Mr Bickersdyke?'
Addressed thus directly, the manager allowed his gaze to wander from
the ceiling. He eyed Psmith for a moment like an elderly basilisk, then
looked back at the ceiling again.
'I shall speak to you tomorrow,' he said.
Psmith heaved a heavy sigh.
'You will not see us tomorrow,' he said, pushing the brandy a little
nearer.
Mr Bickersdyke's eyes left the ceiling once more.
'What do you mean?' he said.
'Drink this,' urged Psmith sympathetically, holding out the glass. 'Be
brave,' he went on rapidly. 'Time softens the harshest blows. Shocks
stun us for the moment, but we recover. Little by little we come to
ourselves again. Life, which we had thought could hold no more pleasure
for us, gradually shows itself not wholly grey.'
Mr Bickersdyke seemed about to make an observation at this point, but
Psmith, with a wave of the hand, hurried on.
'We find that the sun still shines, the birds still sing. Things which
used to entertain us resume their attraction. Gradually we emerge from
the soup, and begin--'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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