Psmith in the CityWodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
General
Psmith in the City
Wodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
Humorous stories
If one looks closely into those actions which are apparently due to
sudden impulse, one generally finds that the sudden impulse was merely
the last of a long series of events which led up to the action. Alone,
it would not have been powerful enough to effect anything. But, coming
after the way has been paved for it, it is irresistible. The hooligan
who bonnets a policeman is apparently the victim of a sudden impulse.
In reality, however, the bonneting is due to weeks of daily encounters
with the constable, at each of which meetings the dislike for his
helmet and the idea of smashing it in grow a little larger, till
finally they blossom into the deed itself.
This was what happened in Mike's case. Day by day, through the summer,
as the City grew hotter and stuffier, his hatred of the bank became
more and more the thought that occupied his mind. It only needed a
moderately strong temptation to make him break out and take the
consequences.
Psmith noticed his restlessness and endeavoured to soothe it.
'All is not well,' he said, 'with Comrade Jackson, the Sunshine of the
Home. I note a certain wanness of the cheek. The peach-bloom of your
complexion is no longer up to sample. Your eye is wild; your merry
laugh no longer rings through the bank, causing nervous customers to
leap into the air with startled exclamations. You have the manner of
one whose only friend on earth is a yellow dog, and who has lost the
dog. Why is this, Comrade Jackson?'
They were talking in the flat at Clement's Inn. The night was hot.
Through the open windows the roar of the Strand sounded faintly. Mike
walked to the window and looked out.
'I'm sick of all this rot,' he said shortly.
Psmith shot an inquiring glance at him, but said nothing. This
restlessness of Mike's was causing him a good deal of inconvenience,
which he bore in patient silence, hoping for better times. With Mike
obviously discontented and out of tune with all the world, there was
but little amusement to be extracted from the evenings now. Mike did
his best to be cheerful, but he could not shake off the caged feeling
which made him restless.
'What rot it all is!' went on Mike, sitting down again. 'What's the
good of it all? You go and sweat all day at a desk, day after day, for
about twopence a year. And when you're about eighty-five, you retire.
It isn't living at all. It's simply being a bally vegetable.'
'You aren't hankering, by any chance, to be a pirate of the Spanish
main, or anything like that, are you?' inquired Psmith.
'And all this rot about going out East,' continued Mike. 'What's the
good of going out East?'
'I gather from casual chit-chat in the office that one becomes
something of a blood when one goes out East,' said Psmith. 'Have
a dozen native clerks under you, all looking up to you as the Last
Word in magnificence, and end by marrying the Governor's daughter.'
'End by getting some foul sort of fever, more likely, and being booted
out as no further use to the bank.'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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