Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 1, CompleteVarious
General
Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 1, Complete
Various
English wit and humor -- Periodicals
Let your schneider baste the trousers together, and when you have put
them on, let them be braced to their natural tension; the schneider
should then, with a small pair of scissors, cut out all the wrinkles
which offend the eye. The garment, being removed from your person, is
again taken to the tailors laboratory, and the embrasures carefully and
artistically fine-drawn. The process for walking or riding trousers only
varies in these particularsfor the one you should stand upright, for
the other you should straddle the back of a chair. Trousers cut on these
principles entail only two inconveniences, to which every one with the
true feelings of a gentleman would willingly submit. You must never
attempt to sit down in your walking trousers, or venture to assume an
upright position in your equestrians, for compound fractures in the
region of the os sacrum, or dislocations about the genu patellæ are
certain to be the results of such rashness, and then
A valet shakes a brush at a gentlemen cuddling a housemaid. THE PEACE
OF THE VALET IS FLED.
SONGS FOR THE SENTIMENTAL. NO. 6. Thou hast humbled the proud,
For my spirit hath bowd
More humbly to thee than it eer bowd before;
But thy powr is past,
Thou hast triumphd thy last,
And the heart you enslaved beats in freedom once more!
I have treasured the flowr
You wore but an hour,
And knelt by the mound where together weve sat;
But thy-folly and pride
I now only deride
So, fair Isabel, take your change out of that!
That I loved, and how well,
It were madness to tell
To one who hath mockd at my maddning despair.
Like the white wreath of snow
On the Alps rugged brow,
Isabel, I have proved thee as cold as thourt fair!
Twas thy boast that I sued,
That you scornd as I wood
Though thou of my hopes were the Mount Ararat;
But to-morrow I wed
Araminta instead
So, fair Isabel, take your change out of that!
THE LAST HAUL. The ponds in St. Jamess Park were on last Monday drawn
with nets, and a large quantity of the fish preserved there carried away
by direction of the Chief Commissioner of Woods and Forests. Our
talented correspondent, Ben DIsraeli, sends us the following squib on
the circumstance:
Oh! never more, Duncannon cried,
The spoils of place shall fill our dishes!
But though weve lost the loaves well take
Our last sad haul amongst the fishes.
GENERAL SATISFACTION. Lord Coventry declared emphatically that the sons,
the fathers, and the grandfathers were all satisfied with the present
corn laws. Had his lordship thought of the Herald, he might have added,
and the grandmothers also.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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