The arms of Austria are the eagle; the double-headed eagle. When, however, we think of the paper currency of the house of Hapsburgh--currency issued only to be dishonoured--the supporters of Austria are surely not eagles, but--as NOKES, the wag upon 'Change, says--_kites_. * * * * * HOW TO PAY YOUR TAXES. "MR. PUNCH, "Direct Taxation may be compensated for by cheapness; but it is very painful. When we are compelled to pay a lot of money at once, we feel a pang which the disbursement of twice as much distributed over a longer period, in small additions to our expenditure, does not occasion. The latter case resembles the gradual extraction of a single hair: the former is equivalent to having a whole handful torn right out. You know that you may lose a quantity of blood by frequent leeching, which, if abstracted at once from your system, would make you faint. I am still suffering from the recent payment of my assessed taxes; and shall not lose the horrible sensation for a week. As to the Income-Tax--it has the effect of a fine: a regular punishment. Couldn't these dreadful penalties be paid by instalments? I declare I am almost determined the next time I am forced to undergo one of them, to have myself put under the influence of chloroform. I have sometimes thought of brandy instead; but I have a generous weakness, which spirituous liquors are apt to stimulate, and I am afraid that if I were to pay my Income-Tax in the state I allude to, I should fling down a few guineas over the amount as a voluntary contribution, overcome with enthusiastic devotion to my QUEEN and Country. "Yours, a severely plucked _September 29, 1853._" "MICHAELMAS GOOSE." "P.S. If we have war, these taxes will become quite intolerable; and chloroform will be absolutely necessary." * * * * * OUR SHABBY CONTEMPORARIES [Illustration] We have a bone to pick with our contemporaries. In reporting the speech of LORD PALMERSTON, at Perth, they recorded a passage in which the noble Lord suggested that those who saw and heard things that were going wrong, should communicate them to the public officer whose duty it is to put them right, which would be conferring a great favour on the man in office, as well as doing a benefit of magnitude to the country at large. They represent his Lordship as saying, in continuation:-- "There may be a great deal of chaff in that which is received--but if in a bushel of chaff he shall find a pint of good corn, that bushel of chaff would be worth winnowing, and he can turn that pint of corn to good purposes."