During the whole of these six weeks she did her household duties;
but gradually she became slower in them and still more slow, and
her mother knew that her disappointment was becoming the source of
permanent misery. Rachel never said that she was ill; nor, indeed,
of any special malady did she show signs: but gradually she became
thin and wan, her cheeks assumed a haggard look, and that aspect of
the brow which her mother feared had become habitual to her. Mrs.
Ray observed her closely in all that she did. She knew well of those
watchings for the postman. She was always thinking of her child, and,
after a while, longing that Luke Rowan might come back to them, with
a heart almost as sore with longing as was that of Rachel herself.
But what could she do? She could not bring him back. In all that
she had done,--in giving her sanction to this lover, and again in
withdrawing it, she had been guided by the advice of her clergyman.
Should she go again to him and beg him to restore that young man to
them? Ah! no; great as was her trust in her clergyman she knew that
even he could not do that for her.
During all these weeks hardly a word was spoken openly between
the mother and daughter about the matter that chiefly occupied
the thoughts of them both. Luke Rowan's name was hardly mentioned
between them. Once or twice some allusion was made to the subject of
the brewery, for it was becoming generally known that the lawyers
were already at work on behalf of Rowan's claim; but even on such
occasions as these Mrs. Ray found that her speech was stopped by the
expression of Rachel's eyes, and by those two lines which on such
occasions would mark her forehead. In those days Mrs. Ray became
afraid of her younger daughter,--almost more so than she had ever
been afraid of the elder one. Rachel, indeed, never spoke as Mrs.
Prime would sometimes speak. No word of scolding ever passed her
mouth; and in all that she did she was gentle and observant. But
there was ever on her countenance that look of reproach which by
degrees was becoming almost unendurable. And then her words during
the day were so few! She was so anxious to sit alone in her own room!
She would still read to her mother for some hours in the evening;
but this reading was to her so manifestly a task, difficult and
distasteful!
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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