He combated her arguments, which he refused to consider as arguments,
and demolished them one by one. But the objection which he destroyed
before he went to sleep at night was replaced the next day by another,
and his cause never advanced. Each day he found the citadel he was
besieging girt in by new and intricate defences. The reason was
simple enough: the girl was not in love with him. Her objections, her
arguments, her reasons were as absurd as he proved them to be. But they
were insurmountable because they were really various disguises of the
fact that she did not care for him. They were disguises to herself as
well as to him. He was so altogether a good fellow, so earnest, honest,
and desperate a lover that the primary fact that she did not want his
love did not present itself, and she kept casting about in her mind
for excuses and reasons to explain her lack of feeling. He wooed her in
every obvious way that would present itself to a boy of deep feeling, of
quick mind, and an unlimited letter of credit. He created wants in order
to gratify them later. He suggested her need of things which he had
already ordered, which, before she had been enticed into expressing a
wish for them, were then speeding across the Continent toward her. Every
hour brought her some fresh and ingenuous sign of his thought and of his
devotion. He treated these tributes as a matter of course; if she failed
to observe them and to see his handiwork in them he let them fall to the
ground unnoticed.
His love itself was his argument-in-chief; it was its own excuse; it
needed no allies; “I love you” was his first and last word. It puzzled
her to find that she could not care. When she was alone she asked
herself what there was in him of which she disapproved, and she could
only answer that there was nothing. She asked herself what other men
there were who pleased her more, and she could think of none. On the
contrary, she found him entirely charming as a friend--but his love
distressed her greatly. It was a foreign language; she could not
comprehend it. When he allowed it to appear it completely disguised him
in her eyes; it annoyed her so much that at times she considered herself
a much ill-used young person.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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