“You see, Raquel,” Lois went on desperately, “I hated you before I ever
saw you. Jimmy Hovey always wrote such wonderful things about you and
held you up to me, and I couldn’t bear it. Jimmy had always made a pet
of me. And I just adored him. But he teased me too, and told me my
faults. I guess I always had my own way with papa, but Jimmy would not
give in to me. And that used to make me so angry. I can remember crying
with rage. And then Jimmy would just walk away, and wouldn’t pay any
attention to me. And _I_’d have to be the one to give in. I just hated
it. But I always _did_ give in, because I was so crazy about Jimmy. And
I wanted him to like me, and to admire me.
“When I grew older and went to The Towers I suppose it was just because
I couldn’t wind Jimmy round my finger that I cared so much for his
opinion. Of course I know it did me a lot of good--his trying to
discipline me. I got a little practice in letting some one else have his
own way.
“But Jimmy shouldn’t have teased me so. He should have seen how cruel it
was. And when he praised you it made me hate you. Then, when you came to
school, it seemed as if here was one way I could get the better of
Jimmy. He couldn’t _make_ me like you if I didn’t want to.
“It was horrid and hateful, I know. Oh, Raquel, can you ever forgive me?
I spoiled your school, your only school.” Lois repeated the last words
anxiously. Raquel had scarcely spoken during her confession.
“It’s all right, Lois,” she said at last with some difficulty. It was
hard for her to understand the complicated psychology of Lois’
experience. “I guess I was hateful to you, too, when you wanted to speak
to me there once or twice. And I never told Jimmy a word about your
being in the West. That was pretty bad, you know. Because he might have
missed you, for all I knew.”
“But, Raquel, he is still there, isn’t he? And we shall see him when we
do get back? I’ll tell him just what I did. Because it’s only right he
should know. And, Raquel, I’ll tell you something else. I met your
brother.”
“Yes, I know that.” Raquel grinned.
“What, he told you? When?”
“When he came up to the ranch for Christmas, he described you. You were
looking at a shawl, which he promptly bought for my mother. Just because
you _were_ looking at it, I guess.”
Lois blushed. “And we met him by chance driving home from a ranch
Christmas afternoon. The driver lost the road and Custer, your--your
brother, got out and drove in our car, and showed us the way. I didn’t
know it was he, of course. I didn’t know who it was.
“But I was just crazy about him! I am yet! Only when I learned his name,
I didn’t know how to act; so, as usual, I was horrid again. And I
wouldn’t have done it for anything, if I could have helped it.”
Lois began to cry, her face puckered up like a baby’s. Raquel laughed
outright.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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