"Mercy me!" whispered the wag, "if he should grow up, he'll certainly
turn to a _plane_ tree; for really, he is a very plain man."
The wielder of the ruler gave a tremendous wriggle with the whole body,
which proved as ineffectual as it was violent.
"But don't you think, Ralph," said his tormentor, "as the evening is
drawing in, that something should be done for the poor gentleman; he
will most certainly take cold if he remain here all night; couldn't you
and your school-fellows contrive to build a sort of hut over him? I am
sure I should be very happy to help to carry the boughs--if the man
won't go to the house, the house must go to the man."
"What a fine cock-shy he would make!" said Master Blubberlips.
"O, I should so like to see it," said the lady. "It will be the first
time he has been made _shy_ in his life."
He was certainly like an Indian bound to the stake, and made to suffer
mental torture--but he did not bear it with an Indian's equanimity. As
a few stragglers had been drawn to the funny scene, and more might be
expected, I, and I only, of all the spectators, began to feel some pity
for him; the more especially, as I heard a stout, grinning chaw-bacon
say to the baker's boy of the village, who asked him what was the
matter, "Whoy, Jim, it ben't nothink less than Frenchman's usherman, ha'
drawn all Thickenham common on his'n left leg for a stocking loike."
"Come," thought I, "it's quite time, after that, for the honour of the
academy, to beat a retreat, or we shall be beaten hollow by this
heavy-shod clodpole. Mr Riprapton," said I, "I don't bear you any
malice--but I recollect my wager. If I extricate you out of the
difficulty, will you own that I have won it?"
"Gladly," said he, very sorrowfully.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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