Catholics -- Fiction; Chicago (Ill.) -- Fiction; Divorce -- Fiction; Married women -- Fiction
The picture which she saw on the wall opposite, across the foot of the
bed, was of the Sacred Heart of Jesus.
It was the thing which she had seen oftenest and looked at longest
since she had been in the hospital. It hung directly before her eyes
as she lay in bed with her head on the pillow. She saw it first on
waking and last before sleeping. Sometimes when she awoke suddenly in
the middle of the night she could feel the picture still there,
watching her in the darkness with mournful eyes.
When first she looked at it she realized how crude it was in execution.
Its colors were glaring. The Man wore a shining white cloak which he
drew back to show underneath a blue garment. On this, placed
apparently on the outside of it, was a Sacred Heart of red, girt in
thorns. Holy flames proceeded from it, and there was a nimbus of
encircling light.
She saw that it would have been better if the Sacred Heart had seemed
to glow through His garment, instead of being obviously superposed upon
it; that softer blue and grayer white and less scarlet red would have
been truer tones for a religious picture. She took not a little pride
in her critical perceptiveness.
But as she lay watching the picture day after day, she appreciated the
superficiality of her first judgment of it. She had been looking at
colored inks and the marks made by copper plates, not at a symbol of
eternity.
Does one estimate a put-by baby's slipper, or a lock of someone's hair,
or a wedding ring by its intrinsic worth? If the west side print shop
which made the picture before her had failed, it could have done
nothing else with that subject to portray. All attempts to represent
Christ must fail. Rafael had failed. Everyone would fail.
Even the Church had failed. There had been bad popes, had there not?
But the Church had tried to represent Him. The Church had come nearer
to doing so than any other enginery or person. The saintliest persons
had belonged to her and died for her and in her.
One Church, she knew, He had founded, and left behind Him. One and but
one. "Thou art Peter and on this rock I will build my church." It was
unequivocal. Christ did not say "churches," He said "church." There
was but one which He had built.
And she had defied it; she had hardened her heart against it; she had
sent away its appointed minister in order to exalt herself.
Her eyes were drawn again to the Sacred Heart, bound in the thorns
which she and hers had placed there. So it had been, so it would be.
Christ was crucified again each day, in the hearts of the people whom
He loved. Had she not herself also given Him vinegar upon a sponge?
She felt the tears trickling down her cheeks as she thought of her own
supreme selfishness, and she looked through blurred eyes at the
representation of the most supremely unselfish face that mankind has
been able to conceive.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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