Recollections of a chaperonSullivan, Arabella Jane
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Recollections of a chaperon
Sullivan, Arabella Jane
English fiction -- 19th century
The post-mark was foreign, and there was something in a letter
addressed to her by that name, which struck her as being so strange
that she did not open it, but folding it again in her brother’s
envelope, she waited till she could retire to peruse its contents. She
continued to perform her part of hostess at the breakfast-table, and
told herself it must be a begging letter, from some one, perhaps, who
had known Mr. Cresford at Verdun.
Still the letter haunted her, and she could scarcely smile at the gay
jests which passed round the breakfast-table, or listen to the news
and gossip contained in the correspondence of the other members of
the society. The outside was so covered with post-marks, and various
directions, that she had not remarked in what sort of hand the name
was written, and she quietly took it out of the envelope, just to see
if it did look like a begging letter. Her former name always made her
shudder, she could not tell why, and she had often reproached herself
for the feeling, as an unkind and ungrateful one towards the memory
of him who was gone. It was that strange instinct which had made her
so quickly put this letter aside, and it was with an unaccountable
trepidation that she again drew it forth to examine the hand-writing.
She looked and looked again, till her eyes swam. It was very like the
writing which was only too familiar to her. It was,—it must be his
writing,—she could not be mistaken; only it was impossible.—quite
impossible. Yet it might contain his last behests, which had, from
some cause, never been delivered before. She could not open it. She
hastily concealed it, and turning deadly pale, she sat, scarcely
conscious of what passed around her, till the last person had been
helped to his last cup of tea.
She longed to know the contents, but there came a sickness over her
heart, which made her postpone the dreaded moment. At length the
company rose one by one, and straggled towards the windows. She
summoned all her might, and walked steadily to the door—she sought her
own boudoir, and seating herself upon the sofa, she again unfolded the
envelope, she again gazed on the outside—she had not yet courage to
break the seal.
There was something dreadful in thus receiving the dying injunctions of
one husband, one who had loved her, too, so passionately, in reading
the ebullitions of his vehement affection, when she was the adoring
wife of another. She felt as though he were about to speak to her from
the grave.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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