rather, I ought to say, that Providence which in its own good time
makes choice of its instruments, and which I ever firmly trusted
would not suffer my brother's fine powers to be wasted on unworthy
aims. I am not able to say how the change which has taken place in
his opinions and sentiments was effected; but you know one has not
done _all_ one's thinking at two and twenty. I have been by
circumstances much separated from my brother, and when with him
have had but little communication upon such subjects. It was at a
time when, I think, his religious principles were somewhat
unsettled, that his mind was so passionately absorbed by politics.
The nobler instincts of his nature, diverted for a while from due
direct intercourse with their divine source, turned themselves with
enthusiastic, earnest hope to the desire of benefiting his
fellow-creatures; and to these aims--the reformation of abuses, the
establishment of a better system of government, the gradual
elevation and improvement of the people, and the general progress
of the country towards enlightened liberty and consequent
prosperity--he devoted all his thoughts. This was the period of his
fanatical admiration for Jeremy Bentham and Mill, who, you know,
are our near neighbors here, and whose houses we never pass without
John being inclined to salute them, I think, as the shrines of some
beneficent powers of renovation. And here comes the break in our
intercourse and in my knowledge of his mental and moral progress. I
went to Scotland, and was amazed, after I had been there some time,
to hear from my mother that John had not got his scholarship, and
had renounced his intention of going to the bar and determined to
study for the Church. I returned home, and found him much changed.
His high sense of the duties attending it makes me rejoice most
sincerely that he has chosen that career, which may not be the
surest path to worldly advancement, but if conscientiously followed
must lead, I should think, to the purest happiness this life can
offer. I think much of this change may be attributed to the example
and influence of some deservedly dear friends of his; probably
something to the sobering effect of the disappointment and
mortification of his failure at college, where such sanguine hopes
and expectations of his success had been entertained. Above all, I
refer his present purpose to that higher influence which has
followed him through all his mental wanderings, suggesting the
eager inquiries of his restless and dissatisfied spirit, and
finally leading it to this, its appointed goal. He writes to us in
high spirits from Germany, and his letters are very delightful.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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