Lesbians -- Fiction; Psychological fiction; Women teachers -- Fiction
In spite of herself, however, something of bitterness crept into her
next note to Roger Lumsden, who had inveigled her, she hardly knew how,
into regular correspondence. Her remark that _Alwynne has been away ten
days now_, was set down baldly, with no veiling sub-sentences of
explanation or excuse.
Had she but known it, however, she was not altogether just to Alwynne.
The first hours of reunion did certainly drive her aunt out of Alwynne's
mind, but after a couple of days she was ready to remind herself and
Clare that Elsbeth, too, had some claim on her time. It is possible,
however, that had she been happier, she would have been less readily
scrupulous. Clare had certainly been glad to see her, had, for an hour
or two, been entirely delightful. But with the resumption of their
mutual life Clare was not long in falling back into her old bad ways,
and in revenge for her two months' boredom, in sheer teasing high
spirits at Alwynne's return, as well as in unreasoning, petulant
jealousy, led Alwynne a pretty enough dance. For Clare was jealous,
jealous of these eight weeks of Alwynne's youth that did not belong to
her, and between her jealousy and her own contempt for her jealousy, was
in one of the moods that she and Alwynne alike dreaded.
The mornings at the school came as a relief to them both, but no sooner
were they together again than Clare's pricking devil must out. Scenes
were incessant--wanton, childish scenes. Yet Alwynne, sore and
bewildered as she was by Clare's waxing unreasonableness, was yet not
proof against the sudden surrenders that always contrived to put her in
the wrong. She would repeat to herself that it must be she who was
unreasonable, that she should be flattered rather than distressed, for
instance, that Clare would not let her go home.... She would rather be
with Clare than Elsbeth, wouldn't she? Of course! well, then!...
Nevertheless she could not help wondering if any letters had come for
her; if Elsbeth, expecting her daily, would bother to send them on....
Roger had promised to write.... She thought that really she ought to go
home.
But Clare would not hear of her leaving. Elsbeth wanted Alwynne? So did
she. Didn't Elsbeth always have Alwynne? Surely Alwynne was old enough
to be away from Elsbeth for a fortnight, without leave granted! Really,
with all due respect to her, Alwynne's aunt was a regular Old Man of the
Sea.
"Clare!" Alwynne's tone had a hint of remonstrance.
"Oh, I said 'with all respect.' But if she were not your aunt I should
really be tempted to get rid of her--have you here altogether. You would
like that, Alwynne, eh?"
Alwynne refused to nod, but she laughed.
"'Get rid'? Clare, don't be absurd."
Clare looked at her, smiling, eyes narrowed in the old way.
"Do you think I couldn't get rid of her if I wanted to? I always do what
I set out to do. Look at Henrietta Vigers."
Alwynne sat bolt upright.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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