Lesbians -- Fiction; Psychological fiction; Women teachers -- Fiction
"So I had better not tease at all?"
"You know I don't mean that."
Clare lifted an opened parcel from the table. Alwynne recognised it and
beamed. So Clare was pleased!
"If I tease with needles," she smoothed the paper and began to
straighten the little heap of knotted string, "it's because you annoy me
so often. Why did you send me this, Alwynne?"
She shrugged her shoulders.
"It was your birthday."
"I hate birthdays."
"I know." She spoke flatly, a lump in her throat. She might have known
and saved herself her trouble and her pleasure.... She thought of the
weeks of careful work and her delight in it; of the little sacrifices;
the early rising; the walks with Roger curtailed and foregone....
Everybody had admired it, even Elsbeth had been sure that Clare would be
charmed.... But Clare was angry.... Perhaps it was only that Clare did
not understand.... She roused herself.
"Clare, it's different. Don't you remember?"
Clare gave no sign. She had disentangled the string and was retying it
with elaborate care. Alwynne spoke with eyes fixed upon the dexterous
fingers--
"You challenged me, don't you remember, Clare? When Marion showed us the
things she was making for her sister's trousseau? And you said, would I
ever have the patience, let alone my clumsy fingers? And I said I could,
and you said you would wear all I made. And you did laugh at me so. So I
thought I'd surprise you, and Elsbeth taught me the pillow-lace, and I
was frightfully careful. It's taken months and months, and you love
lace, and oh, Clare! I thought you would be a little bit pleased."
Her lip quivered; she was very childlike in her eagerness and
disappointment.
"Did you think I should wear it?"
Alwynne dimpled.
"It's your size, Clare. Wouldn't you just try it?"
Clare looked at her inscrutably.
"You've taken great pains," she said. "I've been pleased to see it. But
you've shown it to me and I've told you that you've learned to work
well, so it has fulfilled its purpose, hasn't it? And now you'd better
take it back with you. I'm sure you will be able to use it."
She held out the neatly fastened package.
Alwynne's face hardened. She put her hands behind her back.
"I shall do nothing of the kind," she said.
Clare did not seem ruffled.
"Of course you will. And you'll look very pretty in it." She smiled
amiably.
But Alwynne's face did not relax.
"I won't take it back. I gave it to you. I made it to give you pleasure.
If you don't want it, burn it, give it to your maid, throw it away. Do
you think I care what becomes of it? But I won't take it back. That is
an insult. You say that to hurt me."
"You'll take it back because I wish you to."
"I won't. You shouldn't wish me to."
"You know I dislike presents."
"I never labelled it a present in my mind. You talk as if we were
strangers."
"Perhaps, then," murmured Clare, still smiling, "I dislike the hint that
you consider my wardrobe inadequate."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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