Lesbians -- Fiction; Psychological fiction; Women teachers -- Fiction
Clare, glancing at her now and then, sympathised benevolently, and left
her to herself; she understood that side of the child; her remark to
Louise about the resemblance between them had not been made at random;
she was constantly detecting traits and tastes in her similar to her
own. She was interested; she had thought herself unique. Their histories
were not dissimilar; she, too, different as her environment had been,
could look back on a lonely, self-absorbed childhood; she, too, had had
forced and premature successes. They had not been empty ones, she
reflected complacently; she had used those schoolgirl triumphs as
stepping-stones. She doubted if Louise could do the same: there was
something unpractical about Louise--a hint of the visionary in her air.
She had at present none of Clare's passion for power and the incense of
success. Clare, quite aware of her failing, aware that it was a failing
and perversely proud of it, yet hoped that she should not see it
sprouting in the character of Louise. She hated to see her own defects
reproduced (ineffably vulgarised) in others; it jarred her pride. The
discovery of the resemblance between herself and Louise amused and
charmed her, as long as it was confined to the qualities that Clare
admired; but if the girl began to reflect her faults, Clare knew that
she should be irritated.
She considered these things as she sat and sewed. She was an exquisite
needlewoman. The frieze of tapestry that ran round the low-ceilinged
room was her own work. Alwynne had designed it--a history of the loves
of Deirdre and Naismi some months before, when she and Clare had
discovered Yeats together; and Clare had adapted the rough, clever
sketches, working with her usual amazing speed. The foot-deep strips of
needlework and painted silk, with their golden skies and dark
foregrounds, along which the dim, rainbow figures moved, were just what
Clare had wanted to complete her panelled room; for she was
beauty-loving and house-proud, though her love of originality, or more
correctly her tendency to be superior and aloof, often enticed her into
bizarrerie. But the Deirdre frieze was as harmonious as it was unusual;
and Clare, as she daily feasted her eyes on the rich, mellow colours,
was only annoyed that the idea of it had been Alwynne's. That fact,
though she would not own it, was able, though imperceptibly, to taint
Clare's pleasure. She was quite unnecessarily scrupulous in mentioning
Alwynne's share in the work to any one who admired it; but it piqued her
to do so, none the less. If any one had told her that it piqued her she
would have been extremely amused at the absurdity of the idea.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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