Regina, or the Sins of the FathersSudermann, Hermann
General
Regina, or the Sins of the Fathers
Sudermann, Hermann
Fiction
"You know papa--what he is; and if he found out--ah! I believe he would
kill me! Wait patiently, my dear friend! The Bible says, you know,
patience shall be rewarded. So have patience till the hour when I shall
summon you to come to me; then I will tell you all the news. How full
of longing I am to see you! Oh, those lovely days of childhood! What
has become of them? How happy I was then!--Your
"Helene.
"_Postscript_.--Never come to the garden again. I will appoint another
place of meeting. Not in the garden."
Strange, that what a few minutes before had filled him with delight
now seemed flat and colourless, and disappointed him. Doubtless the
half-wild creature was to blame, whose close proximity confused his
judgment. A kind of delirium of bliss seemed to have taken possession
of her. And how she had smiled! how strangely she had stared into
space!
She came back into the room, and moved about it like a somnambulist.
"Regina!"
She half closed her lids, and said, "Yes, _Herr_,"
"What's the matter with you?"
She smilingly shook her head. "Nothing, _Herr_," she answered, and
again that look came into her eyes; they seemed to swim in dreamful
contemplation of some infinite felicity.
He felt his throat contract. Clearly there was still reason to be
afraid of himself.
Then he resolved to speak and listen to her no more, but to live in his
work. He immersed himself in his papers again, sorted and laid aside
important documents, filed, registered, and made copies of them. It
seemed to him that he must get everything in order in anticipation of
some pending catastrophe.
So the day went by, and the evening. Regina crouched in the darkest and
remotest corner she could find and remained motionless. He dared not
cast even a glance in her direction. The blood hammered in his temples,
yellow circles danced before his eyes, every nerve in his body was on
edge from over-fatigue.
On the stroke of ten she rose, murmured goodnight, and disappeared
behind her curtain. He neither answered nor looked up.
At eleven he put out the lights and went to bed too.
"Why does your heart beat like this?" he thought. "Remember your oath."
But the superstitious, indefinable dread of coming disaster haunted him
like a ghost in the darkness.
He got up again, and stole with bare feet across the room to the case
of weapons, that was dimly illumined by the newly-risen moon. He caught
up one of his pistols, which he always kept loaded to be forearmed
against unforeseen events. It had been his faithful friend and
protector in many a bloody fray. To-day it should protect him from
himself. With its trigger cocked, he laid it on the small table by his
bedside.
"It's doubtful whether you sleep a wink now," he said, as he nestled
his head on the pillows. Yet scarcely three seconds later he lost
consciousness, and slumber lapped his tired limbs.
* * * * *
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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