_Hump._ I am his son and heir--but how long I shall be so I can't tell, for he talks every day of disinheriting me. _Pounce._ Dear sir, let me embrace you--Nay, don't be offended if I take the liberty to kiss you. Mr. Fainlove, pray [FAINLOVE _kisses_] kiss the gentleman--Nay, dear sir, don't stare and be surprised, for I have had a desire to be better known to you ever since I saw you one day clinch your fist at your father when his back was turned upon you; for I must own I very much admire a young gentleman of spirit. _Hump._ Why, sir, would it not vex a man to the heart to have an old fool snubbing a body every minute afore company? _Pounce._ Oh fie, he uses you like a boy. _Hump._ Like a boy! He lays me on now and then as if I were one of his hounds. You can't think what a rage he was in this morning because I boggled a little at marrying my own cousin. _Pounce._ A man can't be too scrupulous, Mr. Humphry--a man can't be too scrupulous. _Hump._ Sir, I could as soon love my own flesh and blood; we should squabble like brother and sister; do you think we should not? Mr.----Pray, gentlemen, may I crave the favour of your names? _Pounce._ Sir, I am the very person that has been employed to draw up the articles of marriage between you and your cousin. _Hump._ Ay, say you so? Then you can inform me in some things concerning myself--Pray, sir, what estate am I heir to? _Pounce._ To fifteen hundred pounds a year, an entailed estate. _Hump._ I am glad to hear it with all my heart; and can you satisfy me in another question--Pray how old am I at present? _Pounce._ Three-and-twenty last March. _Hump._ Why, as sure as you are there, they have kept me back. I have been told by some of the neighbourhood that I was born the very year the pigeon-house was built, and everybody knows the pigeon-house is three-and-twenty. Why! I find there have been tricks played me. I have obeyed him all along, as if I had been obliged to it. _Pounce._ Not at all, sir; your father can't cut you out of one acre of fifteen hundred pounds a year. _Hump._ What a fool have I been to give him his head so long! _Pounce._ A man of your beauty and fortune may find out ladies enough that are not akin to you. _Hump._ Look ye, Mr. what d'ye call--as to my beauty, I don't know but they may take a liking to that. But, sir, mayn't I crave your name? _Pounce._ My name, sir, is Pounce, at your service. _Hump._ Pounce, with a P? _Pounce._ Yes, sir, and Samuel, with an S. _Hump._ Why, then, Mr. Samuel Pounce, do you know any gentlewoman that you think I could like? For, to tell you truly, I took an antipathy to my cousin ever since my father proposed her to me; and since everybody knows I came up to be married, I don't care to go down and look balked. _Pounce._ I have a thought just come into my head--Do you see this young gentleman? He has a sister, a prodigious fortune. 'Faith, you two shall be acquainted.