Romantic Love and Personal Beauty: Their development, causal relations, historic and national peculiaritiesFinck, Henry T.
Science
Romantic Love and Personal Beauty: Their development, causal relations, historic and national peculiarities
Finck, Henry T.
Beauty, Personal; Love
And have we not in our very midst thousands of so-called civilised
beings who require stimulants almost as coarse as the savage to amuse
their dull imaginations?—people who would hesitate to pay silver for a
book, a concert, or an art exhibition, but gladly give gold to witness
the execution of a criminal or an exhibition of animals torturing one
another to death. To suppose that such people can ever fall in
Love—Romantic Love—is more than absurd.
Children represent this savage stage of the evolution of sympathy; as
their imagination, like all their mental powers, is still in embryo.
Nothing delights the average boy so much as a chance to torture a
beetle, a cat, or a dog. And Mr. Galton somewhere refers to the sense of
blood-curdling produced on him and other sensitive persons in the London
Zoological Gardens at the sight of snakes devouring living animals.
“Yet,” he adds, “I have often seen people—nurses, for instance, and
children of all ages—looking unconcernedly and amusedly at the scene.”
To substitute Sympathy for this delight in torture—to arouse the
sluggish imagination from its thousand years’ sleep, and quicken its
sense of suffering in man and animals—is one of the greatest problems of
moral culture, and—so far as man is concerned—forms one of the keynotes
of Christianity. St. Paul bids us both to bear one another’s burdens and
to rejoice with one another. The second part of his injunction, however,
has been comparatively neglected, as is best shown by the circumstance
that we have several terms to express the sharing of sorrow (compassion,
pity, sympathy), whereas for the sharing of joy there is no special noun
in the English language. The Germans have a word for it—_Mitfreude_—yet
it rarely occurs out of philosophical treatises. The word Sympathy,
which literally means “suffering with,” has also been most commonly used
in that sense. But it is now frequently being used in the sense of
sharing joy too, and perhaps, despite its etymology, it will, for lack
of another word, be chiefly used in this sense in future. Even at
present, when persons are spoken of as sympathetic or antipathetic, much
less regard is paid to their willingness to bear our burdens or share
our sorrows than to the chances of their sharing in our pleasures by
having similar tastes and opinions.
For this change in the meaning of Sympathy, Romantic Love must, I
believe, be held chiefly responsible. To some extent, no doubt, friends
and relatives shared one another’s joys before the advent of Love. Yet
even the mother—taking the most favourable case—cannot enter into all
her child’s feelings, while to the child most of her mature emotions are
utterly incomprehensible; so that we miss here that reciprocation which
is the very essence of Sympathy; whereas a lover cannot even conceive a
pleasure unless the other shares it—another point in the psychology of
Modern Love to which Shakspere has given the most poetic expression—
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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