England -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction
At last William Preston and she were wed; and she went to be mistress
of a well-stocked house, not above half-an-hour’s walk from where aunt
Fanny lived. I believe she did all that she could to please my father;
and a more dutiful wife, I have heard him himself say, could never have
been. But she did not love him, and he soon found it out. She loved
Gregory, and she did not love him. Perhaps, love would have come in
time, if he had been patient enough to wait; but it just turned him
sour to see how her eye brightened and her colour came at the sight of
that little child, while for him who had given her so much, she had
only gentle words as cold as ice. He got to taunt her with the
difference in her manner, as if that would bring love: and he took a
positive dislike to Gregory,—he was so jealous of the ready love that
always gushed out like a spring of fresh water when he came near. He
wanted her to love him more, and perhaps that was all well and good;
but he wanted her to love her child less, and that was an evil wish.
One day, he gave way to his temper, and cursed and swore at Gregory,
who had got into some mischief, as children will; my mother made some
excuse for him; my father said it was hard enough to have to keep
another man’s child, without having it perpetually held up in its
naughtiness by his wife, who ought to be always in the same mind that
he was; and so from little they got to more; and the end of it was,
that my mother took to her bed before her time, and I was born that
very day. My father was glad, and proud, and sorry, all in a breath;
glad and proud that a son was born to him; and sorry for his poor
wife’s state, and to think how his angry words had brought it on. But
he was a man who liked better to be angry than sorry, so he soon found
out that it was all Gregory’s fault, and owed him an additional grudge
for having hastened my birth. He had another grudge against him before
long. My mother began to sink the day after I was born. My father sent
to Carlisle for doctors, and would have coined his heart’s blood into
gold to save her, if that could have been; but it could not. My aunt
Fanny used to say sometimes, that she thought that Helen did not wish
to live, and so just let herself die away without trying to take hold
on life; but when I questioned her, she owned that my mother did all
the doctors bade her do, with the same sort of uncomplaining patience
with which she had acted through life. One of her last requests was to
have Gregory laid in her bed by my side, and then she made him take
hold of my little hand. Her husband came in while she was looking at us
so, and when he bent tenderly over her to ask her how she felt now, and
seemed to gaze on us two little half-brothers, with a grave sort of
kindness, she looked up in his face and smiled, almost her first smile
at him; and such a sweet smile! as more besides aunt Fanny have said.
In an hour she was dead. Aunt Fanny came to live with us. It was the
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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