English essays -- 19th century; Great Britain -- Social life and customs; London (England) -- Description and travel
intelligent young man) examines the medical, historical, topographical
books necessary; his chief points out to him in Jeremy Taylor (fol.,
London, M.DCLV.) a few remarks, such as might befit a dear old
archbishop departing this life. When I come back to dress for dinner,
the archbishop is dead on my table in five pages; medicine, topography,
theology, all right, and Jones has gone home to his family some hours.
Sir Christopher is the architect of St. Paul's. He has not laid the
stones or carried up the mortar. There is a great deal of carpenter's
and joiner's work in novels which surely a smart professional hand might
supply. A smart professional hand? I give you my word, there seem to me
parts of novels--let us say the love-making, the “business,” the villain
in the cupboard, and so forth, which I should like to order John Footman
to take in hand, as I desire him to bring the coals and polish the
boots. Ask ME indeed to pop a robber under a bed, to hide a will which
shall be forthcoming in due season, or at my time of life to write a
namby-pamby love conversation between Emily and Lord Arthur! I feel
ashamed of myself, and especially when my business obliges me to do
the love-passages, I blush so, though quite alone in my study, that
you would fancy I was going off in an apoplexy. Are authors affected
by their own works? I don't know about other gentlemen, but if I make a
joke myself I cry; if I write a pathetic scene I am laughing wildly all
the time--at least Tomkins thinks so. You know I am such a cynic!
The editor of the Cornhill Magazine (no soft and yielding character like
his predecessor, but a man of stern resolution) will only allow these
harmless papers to run to a certain length. But for this veto I should
gladly have prattled over half a sheet more, and have discoursed on many
heroes and heroines of novels whom fond memory brings back to me. Of
these books I have been a diligent student from those early days, which
are recorded at the commencement of this little essay. Oh, delightful
novels, well remembered! Oh, novels, sweet and delicious as the
raspberry open-tarts of budding boyhood! Do I forget one night after
prayers (when we under-boys were sent to bed) lingering at my cupboard
to read one little half-page more of my dear Walter Scott--and down came
the monitor's dictionary upon my head! Rebecca, daughter of Isaac of
York, I have loved thee faithfully for forty years! Thou wert twenty
years old (say) and I but twelve, when I knew thee. At sixty odd, love,
most of the ladies of thy Orient race have lost the bloom of youth,
and bulged beyond the line of beauty; but to me thou art ever young and
fair, and I will do battle with any felon Templar who assails thy fair
name.
ON A PEAR-TREE.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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