Domestic fiction; England -- Fiction; Mothers and sons -- Fiction; Religious fiction; Unmarried mothers -- Fiction
The third night after this was to be the crisis--the turning-point
between Life and Death. Mr Davis came again to pass it by the bedside
of the sufferer. Ruth was there, constant and still, intent upon
watching the symptoms, and acting according to them, in obedience
to Mr Davis's directions. She had never left the room. Every sense
had been strained in watching--every power of thought or judgment
had been kept on the full stretch. Now that Mr Davis came and took
her place, and that the room was quiet for the night, she became
oppressed with heaviness, which yet did not tend to sleep. She could
not remember the present time, or where she was. All times of her
earliest youth--the days of her childhood--were in her memory with a
minuteness and fulness of detail which was miserable; for all along
she felt that she had no real grasp on the scenes that were passing
through her mind--that, somehow, they were long gone by, and gone by
for ever--and yet she could not remember who she was now, nor where
she was, and whether she had now any interests in life to take the
place of those which she was conscious had passed away, although
their remembrance filled her mind with painful acuteness. Her head
lay on her arms, and they rested on the table. Every now and then she
opened her eyes, and saw the large room, handsomely furnished with
articles that were each one incongruous with the other, as if bought
at sales. She saw the flickering night-light--she heard the ticking
of the watch, and the two breathings, each going on at a separate
rate--one hurried, abruptly stopping, and then panting violently, as
if to make up for lost time; and the other slow, steady, and regular,
as if the breather was asleep; but this supposition was contradicted
by an occasional repressed sound of yawning. The sky through the
uncurtained window looked dark and black--would this night never have
an end? Had the sun gone down for ever, and would the world at last
awaken to a general sense of everlasting night?
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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