“He's sleeping beautiful—the lamb. I'll go down and get a
cup o' tea, and come up, ma'am, when the gong goes.” In the
way peculiar to those who have never to initiate, but only to support
positions in which they are placed by others, she had adopted for
herself the theory that Noel was a real war-widow. She knew the truth
perfectly; for she had watched that hurried little romance at Kestrel,
but by dint of charity and blurred meditations it was easy for her to
imagine the marriage ceremony which would and should have taken place;
and she was zealous that other people should imagine it too. It was so
much more regular and natural like that, and “her” baby invested
with his proper dignity. She went downstairs to get a “cup o'
tea,” thinking: 'A picture they make—that they do, bless his
little heart; and his pretty little mother—no more than a child, all
said and done.'
Noel had been standing there some minutes in the failing light, absorbed
in the face of the sleeping baby, when, raising her eyes, she saw in
a mirror the refection of her father's dark figure by the door. She
could hear him breathing as if the ascent of the stairs had tired him;
and moving to the head of the cot, she rested her hand on it, and turned
her face towards him. He came up and stood beside her, looking silently
down at the baby. She saw him make the sign of the Cross above it, and
the movement of his lips in prayer. Love for her father, and rebellion
against this intercession for her perfect baby fought so hard in the
girl's heart that she felt suffocated, and glad of the dark, so that
he could not see her eyes. Then he took her hand and put it to his lips,
but still without a word; and for the life of her she could not speak
either. In silence, he kissed her forehead; and there mounted in Noel a
sudden passion of longing to show him her pride and love for her baby.
She put her finger down and touched one of his hands. The tiny sleeping
fingers uncurled and, like some little sea anemone, clutched round it.
She heard her father draw his breath in; saw him turn away quickly,
silently, and go out. And she stayed, hardly breathing, with the hand of
her baby squeezing her finger.
II 1
When Edward Pierson, afraid of his own emotion, left the twilit nursery,
he slipped into his own room, and fell on his knees beside his bed,
absorbed in the vision he had seen. That young figure in Madonna blue,
with the halo of bright hair; the sleeping babe in the fine dusk; the
silence, the adoration in that white room! He saw, too; a vision of the
past, when Noel herself had been the sleeping babe within her mother's
arm, and he had stood beside them, wondering and giving praise. It
passed with its other-worldliness and the fine holiness which belongs to
beauty, passed and left the tormenting realism of life. Ah! to live with
only the inner meaning, spiritual and beautifed, in a rare wonderment
such as he had experienced just now!
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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