But it was not so easy to conquer that meek little woman. "I feel very
much fatigued to-day," she said, turning her eyes, mild but invincible,
with the most distinct contradiction of her words to her son's face; "if
it had not been my anxiety to have all I could of you, Arthur, I should
not have got up to-day. A journey is a very serious matter, dear, for an
old woman. One does not feel it so much at first," continued this
plausible defendant, still with her mild eyes on her son's face, secure
in the perfect reasonableness of her plea, yet not unwilling that he
should perceive it was a pretence; "it is the next day one feels it. I
shall lie down on the sofa, and rest when you are gone."
And, looking into his mother's soft eyes, the young Nonconformist
retreated, and made no more attempts to shake her. Not the
invulnerability of the fortress alone discouraged him--though that was
mildly obdurate, and proof to argument--but a certain uneasiness in the
thought of that meeting, an inclination to postpone it, and stave off
the thought of all that might follow, surprised himself in his own mind.
Why he should be afraid of the encounter, or how any complication could
arise out of it, he could not by any means imagine, but such was the
instinctive sentiment in his heart.
Accordingly he went up to London by the train, leaving Mrs. Hilyard
unwarned, and his mother reposing on the sofa, from which, it is sad to
say, she rose a few minutes after he was gone, to refresh herself by
tidying his bookcase and looking over all his linen and stockings, in
which last she found a very wholesome subject of contemplation, which
relieved the pressure of her thoughts much more effectually than could
have been done by the rest which she originally proposed. Arthur, for
his part, went up to London with a certain nervous thrill of anxiety
rising in his breast as he approached the scene and the moment of his
inquiries; though it was still only by intervals that he realised the
momentous nature of those inquiries, on the result of which poor Susan's
harmless girlish life, all unconscious of the danger that threatened
it, hung in the balance. Poor Susan! just then going on with a bride's
preparations for the approaching climax of her youthful existence. Was
she, indeed, really a bride, with nothing but truth and sweet honour in
the contract that bound her, or was she the sport of a villanous pastime
that would break her heart, and might have shipwrecked her fair fame and
innocent existence? Her brother set his teeth hard as he asked himself
that question. Minister as he was, it might have been a dangerous chance
for Fordham, had he come at that moment without ample proofs of
guiltlessness in the Nonconformist's way.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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