Men -- Russia -- Fiction; Russia -- Social life and customs -- 20th century -- Fiction
“Why all these tragic airs?” he asked. Unconsciously allured by their
beauty of outline, he glanced at her soft shoulders and exquisitely
moulded arms. Her gesture of helplessness and despair made him feel
sure of his superiority. It was as if they were being weighed in
scales, one sinking when the other rose. Sarudine felt a cruel pleasure
in knowing that this girl whom instinctively he had considered superior
to himself was now made to suffer through him. In the first stage of
their intimacy he had feared her. Now she had been brought to shame and
dishonour; at which he was glad.
He grew softer. Gently he took her strengthless hands in his, and drew
her closer to him. His senses were roused; his breath came quicker.
“Never mind! It’ll be all right! There is nothing so dreadful about it,
after all!”
“So you think, eh?” replied Lida scornfully. It was scorn that helped
her to recover herself, and she gazed at him with strange intensity.
“Why, of course I do,” said Sarudine, attempting to embrace her in a
way that he knew to be effective. But she remained cold and lifeless.
“Come, now, why are you so cross, my pretty one?” he murmured in a
gentle tone of reproof.
“Let me go! Let me go, I say!” exclaimed Lida, as she shook him off.
Sarudine felt physically hurt that his passion should have been roused
in vain.
“Women are the very devil!” he thought.
“What’s the matter with you?” he asked testily, and his face flushed.
As if the question had brought something to her mind, she suddenly
covered her face with both hands and burst into tears. She wept just as
peasant-women weep, sobbing loudly, her face buried in her hands, her
body being bent forward, while her dishevelled hair drooped over her
wet, distorted countenance. Sarudine was utterly nonplussed. He smiled,
though yet afraid that this might give offence, and tried to pull away
her hands from her face. Lida stubbornly resisted, weeping all the
while.
“Oh! my God!” he exclaimed. He longed to shout at her, to wrench her
hands aside, to call her hard names.
“What are you whining for like this? You’ve gone wrong with me, worse
luck, and there it is! Why all this weeping just to-day? For heaven’s
sake, stop!” Speaking thus roughly, he caught hold of her hand.
The jerk caused her head to oscillate to and fro. She suddenly stopped
crying, and removed her hands from her tear-stained face, looking up at
him in childish fear. A crazy thought flashed through her mind that
anybody might strike her now. But Sarudine’s manner again softened, and
he said in a consoling voice:
“Come, my Lidotschka, don’t cry any more! You’re to blame, as well! Why
make a scene? You’ve lost a lot, I know; but, still, we had so much
happiness, too, didn’t we? And we must just forget….” Lida began to sob
once more.
“Oh! stop it, do!” he shouted. Then he walked across the room,
nervously pulling his moustache, and his lips quivered.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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