GERVASE. Yes, I thought that would move you--and I want you to ask
your mother if you can bring me some breakfast up here. Now, listen
very carefully, because we are coming to the important part.
Hard-boiled eggs, bread, butter, and a bottle of milk--and anything
else she likes. Tell her that it's most important, because your old
friend Mallory whom you shot white mice with in Egypt is starving by
the roadside. And if you come back here with a basket quickly, I'll
give you as many bull's-eyes as you can eat in a week. (Very
earnestly) Now, Ernest, with all the passion and emotion of which I am
capable before breakfast, I ask you: have you got that?
ERN (nodding). Going 'ome. (He looks at the half-crown again.)
GERVASE. Going 'ome. Yes. But--returning with breakfast. Starving
man--lost in forest--return with basket--save life. (To himself) I
believe I could explain it better to a Chinaman. (to ERN) Now then,
off you go.
ERN (as he goes off). 'Ad my breakfast.
GERVASE. Yes, and I wonder if I shall get mine.
(GERVASE walks slowly after him and stands looking at him as he goes
down the hill. Then, turning round, he sees another stranger in the
distance.)
GERVASE. Hullo, here's another of them. (He walks towards the log)
Horribly crowded the country's getting nowadays. (He puts on his
coat.)
(A moment later a travelling Peddler, name of SUSAN, comes in singing.
He sees GERVASE sitting on the log.)
SUSAN (with a bow). Good morning, sir.
GERVASE. (looking round). Good morning.
SUSAN. I had thought to be alone. I trust my singing did not
discommode you.
GERVASE. Not at all. I like it. Do go on.
SUSAN. Alas, the song ends there.
GERVASE. Oh, well, couldn't we have it again?
SUSAN. Perhaps later, sir, if you insist. (Taking off his hat) Would
it inconvenience you if I rested here for a few minutes?
GERVASE. Not a bit. It's a jolly place to rest at, isn't it? Have you
come far this morning?
SUSAN. Three or four miles--a mere nothing on a morning like this.
Besides, what does the great William say?
GERVASE. I don't think I know him. What does he say?
SUSAN. A merry heart goes all the way.
GERVASE. Oh, Shakespeare, yes.
SUSAN. And why, you ask, am I merry?
GERVASE. Well, I didn't, but I was just going to. Why are you merry?
SUSAN. Can you not guess? What does the great Ralph say?
GERVASE (trying hard). The great Ralph. . . . No, you've got me there.
I'm sure I don't know him. Well, what does he say?
SUSAN. Give me health and a day, and I will make the pomp of Empires
ridiculous.
GERVASE. Emerson, of course. Silly of me.
SUSAN. So you see, sir--I am well, the day is well, all is well.
GERVASE. Sir, I congratulate you. In the words of the great Percy--(to
himself) that's got him.
SUSAN (at a loss). The--er--great Percy?
GERVASE. Hail to thee, blithe spirit!
SUSAN (eagerly). I take you, I take you! Shelley! Ah, there's a poet,
Mr.--er--I don't think I quite caught your name.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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