GERVASE. Tuppence for a banquet like this? My dear friend, nothing less than half-a-crown will satisfy me. SUSAN. Sixpence. Not a penny more. GERVASE (with a sigh). Very well, then. (He begins to feel in his pocket, and in so doing reveals part of his dress. SUSAN opens his eyes at it, and then goes on eating. GERVASE finds his purse and produces sixpence, which he gives to SUSAN.) Sir, I thank you. (He resumes his breakfast.) SUSAN. You are too generous. . . . Forgive me for asking, but you are not by chance a fellow-traveller upon the road? GERVASE. Do you mean professionally? SUSAN. Yes. There is a young fellow, a contortionist and sword-swallower, known locally in these parts as Humphrey the Human Hiatus, who travels from village to village. Just for a moment I wondered-- (He glances at GERVASE's legs, which are uncovered. GERVASE hastily wraps his coat round them.) GERVASE. I am not Humphrey. No. Gervase the Cheese Swallower. . . . Er--my costume-- SUSAN. Please say nothing more. It was ill-mannered of me to have inquired. Let a man wear what he likes. It is a free world. GERVASE. Well, the fact is, I have been having a bathe. SUSAN (with a bow). I congratulate you on your bathing costume. GERVASE. Not at all. SUSAN. You live near here then? GERVASE. Little Malling. I came over in a car. SUSAN. Little Malling? That's about twenty miles away. GERVASE. Oh, much more than that surely. SUSAN. No. There's Hedgling down there. GERVASE (surprised). Hedgling? Heavens, how I must have lost my way. . . . Then I have been within a mile of her all night. And I never knew! SUSAN. You are married, Mr. Mallory? GERVASE. No. Not yet. SUSAN. Get married. GERVASE. What? SUSAN. Take my advice and get married. GERVASE. You recommend it? SUSAN. I do. . . . There is no companion like a wife, if you marry the right woman. GERVASE. Oh? SUSAN. I have been married thirty years. Thirty years of happiness. GERVASE. But in your profession you must go away from your wife a good deal. SUSAN (smiling). But then I come back to her a good deal. GERVASE (thoughtfully). Yes, that must be rather jolly. SUSAN. Why do you think I welcomed your company so much when I came upon you here this morning? GERVASE (modestly). Oh, well----