'Scarcely had we begun to repent our error, when my father discovered my
retreat; and once more tore me from my love. Guarded, fettered, and
enduring every species of brutal usage from those employed about me, I
was conveyed first to London, and then sent abroad, where I remained
above two years--refusing to give her up, and refused upon any other
terms to be allowed to return. My father's death gave me liberty. I flew
to England; and found my Arabella pining under the accumulated
distresses of extreme poverty, destroyed reputation, and a consumptive
habit: all which miseries were rendered doubly poignant by the
possession of an infant.
'I will not attempt, madam, to describe to you what I endured when I saw
her and my child wanting absolute necessaries. All I could call my own
was employed to procure medical advice for Arabella; and that all was a
trifle. My father, to the astonishment of every one, had died insolvent.
My sisters were taken into dependence by different relations; and I was
turned adrift on the world without knowledge or means to procure myself
one penny. To assist those who have no power to assist themselves, who
have no claims but on me, me the author of their calamity, I have
plunged myself into debt. The man of whom I have borrowed money pointed
out to me the plan of marrying your mother; and, when I revolted at the
dishonourable action, he showed me the opposite picture--a jail.--What
can I do, Miss Ashburn? Can I see them die--and consent to linger out my
wretched existence in a prison? No! I am driven by extremity of
distress; and must go on, or perish.'
'Does Arabella know you intend to marry?'
'O yes.'
'Where is she? May I see her?'
'She and her child reside at the distance of three miles from this
place.'
I prevailed on Mr. Davenport to ride with me to the village in which
Arabella resided; and, after introducing me to her, I also prevailed on
him to leave us alone.
Arabella had beside her a tambour frame, at which she worked, when her
cough and cold sweats would permit her. The little girl played on the
floor. She received us with that sort of composure which seemed to
denote the utter sacrifice of all her hopes and wishes, and that nothing
was now left to excite agitation. I said, 'I am no stranger to your
misfortunes, Arabella. In what manner did you support yourself, while
Mr. Davenport was abroad?'
'By fancy works,' replied she, pointing to the frame. 'I endeavoured
also to teach a school; but Mr. Davenport's father had spread such
reports of me, which the birth of my child but too well confirmed, that
scarce any one would give me the least encouragement.'
'What were your parents?'
'Poor shopkeepers, madam, who put themselves to numberless
inconveniences to qualify me for earning my subsistence in a comfortable
manner. Could I regain my health, and be removed to some place where no
one knew my faults, Mr. Davenport should not be burthened with either of
us; he should not----'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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