"Am I a kennel-dog in the estimation of the Bastard of England?" cried Mary of Scots, when Queen Elizabeth refused her safe-conduct through England upon her departure from France (Summer 1561).] CHAPTER LVI I AM DETERMINED TO DO AS I PLEASE I reject mother's tearful reproaches--I beard Prince George in his lair despite whining chamberlains--I tell him what I think of him, and he becomes frightened--Threatens madhouse--"I dare you to steal my children"--I win my point--and the children--"Her Imperial Highness regrets"--Lots of forbidden literature--Precautions against intriguing Grand Mistress--The affair with Henry--was it a flower-covered pit to entrap me?--Castle Stolpen and some of its awful history. DRESDEN, _November 5, 1901_. Patience ceased to be a virtue. Tolerance would be a crime against myself. I am determined to do as I please in future. If it upsets the King's, Prince George's and the rest's delicate digestion, so much the better. The newspapers are hinting about my troubles with Prince George and the King. When I go driving or appear at the theatre, the public shows its sympathy in many ways. Sometimes I am acclaimed to the echo. Mamma wrote me a tearful letter. She spent six hours in prayers for "sinful Louise" and sends me the fruits of her meditations: six pages of close script, advising me how to regain the King's and Prince George's favor. Never before have I failed in outward respect to my mother, but this time I wrote to her: "Pray attend to your own affairs. Don't meddle in mine which you are entirely unable to understand." * * * * * DRESDEN, _November 6, 1901_. Bernhardt was sent to Sonnenstein. Whether he became insane at Nossen, or whether it is the family's intention to drive him mad among the madmen of Sonnenstein, I don't know, but it behooves me to be careful. Sonnenstein has accommodation for both sexes. * * * * * LOSCHWITZ, _November 15, 1901_. I sent a letter to the King, asking him to have Loschwitz Castle prepared for my reception. His Majesty didn't deign to answer, but Prince George commanded me in writing to stay at Dresden "under his watchful eye." I immediately proceeded to his apartments in my morning undress, without hat, gloves or wrap. As I rushed through the anteroom, Adjutant von Metsch begged me with up-lifted hands not to force His Royal Highness's door, Prince George being too ill to receive me, etc., etc. I paid no attention to his mournful whinings. At that moment I had courage enough to stock a regiment. "So you won't allow me to go to Loschwitz," I addressed George as I suddenly bobbed up at the side of his desk. My father-in-law looked at me as if I were a spook, emerged from a locked closet. "Who let you in?" he managed to say after a while.