Startled by the sound, she tried to turn her thoughts from the present
to all that was most bright in the future.
"So--we are to be married to-morrow. Oh, Geoff, Geoff, my darling!"
But anxiety and apprehension beset her too closely to be avoided. Close
upon this blissful reflection followed another.
"Then--after that--not only my dear one's happiness, but my life--my
very life--depend upon that vile creature here, to whom nothing is
sacred. Am I doing right by Geoff? Oh, if I could only rid myself of
these doubts!"
She sighed and twisted her hands together. Then composed herself to
thought once more.
"But my mind was fully convinced, my conscience upheld me surely enough
until Morris came. Would to Heaven the vessel that brought him to
England had sunk to the bottom of the sea, and that he lay silenced
forever beneath the waters."
Again she sighed. Again she thought.
"Ah me! If these were but the times when witches reigned, gladly would I
sell my very soul to the powers of evil in return for a charm--a
spell--to ensure that man's eternal silence."
Under the stress of such desperate desires, she found it impossible to
remain quietly seated. Rising, she moved restlessly and without object
to and fro from end to end of the little room. Suddenly she noticed that
her dress had brushed against the table, and become slightly soiled with
plaster. It was but a trifling matter, but as she shook and brushed it
clean again, a sudden hot anger burned in her veins.
"It is outrageous!" she said fiercely within herself--"outrageous, that
I should be thus forced to hide, with fear and trembling, in back rooms!
Oh, how I hate that man! How he degrades me! How he has cursed my life!
From the very first hour we met he has dragged me steadily downwards,
and now--now--he is going to use his own sin to damn all the remainder
of my life!
"Promises--what does that word mean to Morris Kenyon? Did he not
promise my father to watch over me--to guard me--and how did he keep
his word? And what promises did he not make to me--oh, again and
again!--in what tender, earnest tones; and then--liar, liar! Morris
talking morality to me! What right has he to do that? What about
himself? What injustice, what evil, equals that of a man--middle-aged,
wise in the world, strong, clever--using every advantage to win a
young girl, and then--then--pretending that, even in his eyes, his own
success renders the girl, not himself, infamous for ever?"
She clenched her hands violently. The bright colour that had flooded her
cheeks mounted to her temples.
"I hate him--I loathe him! But, Heaven, how I fear him! If he
should--oh, if he dares! If he only dares, I'll--I'll...."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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