Did you ever have such thoughts? But, did you find those thoughts, that
slavish terror of God’s wrath, that dread of hell, made you any _better_
men? I never did. I never saw them make any human being better. Unless
you go beyond them—as far beyond them as heaven is beyond hell, as far
above them as a free son is above a miserable crouching slave, they will
do you more harm than good. For this is all that I have seen come of
them: That all this spirit of bondage, this slavish terror, instead of
bringing a man nearer to God, only drove him further from God. It did
not make him hate what was wrong; it only made him dread the punishment
of it. And then, when the first burst of fear cooled down, he began to
say to himself: “I can never atone for my sins. I can never win back God
to love me. What is done, is done. If I cannot escape punishment, let
me be at least as happy as I can while it lasts. If it does not come
to-day, it will come to-morrow. Let me alone, thou tormenting
conscience. Let me eat and drink, for to-morrow I die!” And so back
rushed the poor creature into all his wrong-doing again, and fell most
probably deeper than ever into the mire, because a certain feeling of
desperation and defiance rose up in him, till he began to fancy that his
terror was all a dream—a foolish accidental rising up of old
superstitious words which he learnt from his mother or his nurse; and he
tried to forget it all, and did forget it—God help him!—and his latter
end was worse than his first.
How then shall a man escape shame and misery, and an evil conscience, and
rise out of these sins of his? For do it he must. The wages of sin is
death—death to body and soul; and from sin he must escape.
There is but one way, my friends. There never was but one way. Believe
the text, and therefore believe the warrant of your Baptism. Believe the
message of your Confirmation.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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