And again Tidemand walked down-stairs, down to his office, where he shut
himself in. He went over to the window and stood there, his hands clasped
behind him, staring out into the street with unseeing eyes. No, she had
not changed her mind in the least, that was not to be expected. She had
not hesitated. There she had stood, with her elbow on the desk; she had
heard what he said and she had replied; "Well, I suppose we shall have to
do as you say." There had been no hesitation, no, none at all.... But she
had not exulted, either; she had spared him from witnessing any outburst
of joy. She had been considerate--he had to admit that. Oh, Hanka was
always considerate; God bless her wherever she went! She had stood there.
Hanka, Hanka!... But probably she was rejoicing now; why shouldn't she
be? She had had her way.... And the children were asleep now, both Ida and
Johanna. Poor little things; they did not even reach up to their pillows!
Well, they would be provided for. One might be getting a little grey, but
there was still a fight or two left....
And Tidemand went back to his desk. He worked over his books and papers
until daylight.
II
Mrs. Hanka looked in vain for Irgens for several days. She had hurried to
him to bring him the joyful news; she was free at last! But he was never
at home. His door was locked, and it was not opened when she knocked;
consequently he must be out. She did not meet him in his usual haunts,
either. Finally she had to write to him and make an appointment; she wrote
that she had excellent news for him.
But during these two days, these long hours of waiting in which she could
do nothing, it seemed as if her joy over the coming divorce had begun to
wane. She had dwelt on her happiness so long that she had grown accustomed
to it; it did not make her heart beat faster any more. She was going to be
free from her husband--true, but she had not been so entirely shackled
before. The difference was not so pronounced that she could steadily
continue to revel in it.
And to this was added an indefinable fear, now when the irrevocable
separation confronted her; the thought that she was to leave her home was
tinged with a vague sense of regretfulness, of impalpable foreboding.
Sometimes a quivering pang would pierce her heart when the children put
out their little arms to her; why that pain? She had got out of her bed
last night and looked at them in their sleep. There they were lying, each
in her little bed; they had kicked the blankets off and were uncovered up
to their very arms, but they slept soundly and moved, now and then, a rosy
finger or a dimpled toe in their sleep. Such children! To lie there
unblushingly naked, with arms and legs pointing in all directions! She
tucked them carefully in and left them with bowed head, her shoulders
shaken by inaudible sobs.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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