Sheppard Lee, Written by Himself. Vol. 1 (of 2)Bird, Robert Montgomery
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Sheppard Lee, Written by Himself. Vol. 1 (of 2)
Bird, Robert Montgomery
American fiction -- 19th century; Satire
But why should I detail the particulars of that eventful hour? Even
Tickle's courage sank before the fire of the enraged assailants; and
as for mine, had it been fortified by a heart of steel and ribs of
brass, it must have yielded to the horrors that followed. Duns follow
the same laws as flies and carrion-crows; no sooner does one swoop at a
victim, than down drop a thousand others to share the feast. Scarce had
my landlord and the tailor begun the assault, when there sneaked into
the room a consumptive-looking fellow, smelling strongly of leather and
rosin, who displayed a greasy scrap of paper, and added his pipe to the
others. Then came another, with inky hands, a black spot on his nose,
and a new hat under his arm; then another, and another, and another;
until I believe there were fourteen different souls in the room (or
rather _bodies_, for I don't think they had one soul among them), all
of them armed with long bills, all clamorous for their money, and all
(each being encouraged by the example of the others) as noisy, mad, and
ferocious as any mob of free and independent republicans I ever laid
eyes on. Such a siege of dunning was perhaps never endured, except by
a poor dandy. They dunned and they dinned, they poked out their ugly
bills, and they gave loose to their inhuman tongues,--in a word, they
conducted in such a manner that I was more than once inclined to jump
out the window, being driven to complete desperation.
In the midst of all, and when I saw no escape whatever from my
persecutions, they were brought to a close by a most unexpected
incident. The door flew open, and in rushed--not a fifteenth tormentor,
as I expected--but an angel of light in the person of Nora Magee, who
screamed out at the top of her voice,--
"Och, hinny darlint, your uncle, Misther Wiggins, has come! and in a
beautiful carriage! and he looks as if he could pay your ditts twice
over! Sure, now, and ye'll ax him for my tin dollars?"
CHAPTER IX.
THE AUTHOR RECEIVES A VISIT FROM HIS UNCLE, SAMUEL WILKINS, ESQ., AND
IS RELIEVED FROM HIS TORMENTORS.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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