Russian fiction -- Translations into English; Short stories, Russian -- Translations into English
Complaints began to come in from all quarters that the backs and
shoulders, not alone of titular, but even of court, councillors were
being exposed to the danger of a cold, because of this frequent
deprivation of their cloaks. The police made arrangements to catch the
corpse, at all costs, either alive or dead, and to deal with him most
severely, as an example to others. In this they almost succeeded. A
watchman in Kirishkin Lane seized the corpse by the collar on the very
spot of his misdeeds; for he was in the act of dragging off the frieze
cloak of a retired musician, who in his day had blown the flute. The
watchman’s shout for help fetched two comrades to his side, and into
their hands he committed the marauder, while he himself thrust his
hand for a moment into his boot for his snuff-box, in order to refresh
temporarily his frozen nose. The snuff, however, must have been of such
poor quality that even the corpse could not stand it. Ere the watchman,
who had closed his right nostril with his thumb, had time to apply
a half-handful of the snuff to his left nostril, the corpse sneezed
so violently that the three of them were soon wiping their eyes; and
while they were doing this he vanished so completely that they were
not even sure whether he had been actually in their hands. Henceforth
the watchmen were so apprehensive of dead men that they even refrained
from laying their hands on the living, and only dared to exclaim at a
distance, “Hey, there, go your way!” As for the dead official, he began
to appear even beyond the Kalinkin Bridge, creating no slight terror
among all timid people.
We have, however, wholly neglected a _certain important personage_,
who had been the actual cause of the fantastic turn taken by this true
history. First of all, in justice to the _certain important personage_,
it is necessary to say that immediately after the departure of the
poor, totally crushed Akaki Akakievich he experienced an emotion akin
to pity. It was not new to him--this feeling of sympathy; his heart
was really accessible to many good impulses, notwithstanding the fact
that his rank often interfered with their outward manifestation. No
sooner had his friend gone than he began to think about the poor Akaki
Akakievich. And nearly every day thereafter there appeared before him
the pale Akaki Akakievich, who was unable to bear up under an official
reprimand. The thought agitated him to such an extent that after a
week had passed he resolved even to send an official to learn his
condition, and to see whether he could really assist him. When it was
reported to him that Akaki Akakievich had died suddenly of fever, he
was dumbfounded, suffered the reproaches of conscience, and was in poor
spirits all day long.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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