Elizabeth drew back keenly disappointed. The young man seemed
unconscious of her presence; yet they had not seen each other for weeks.
She turned proudly, and went into the house. The movement aroused Lovel.
He withdrew his eyes from the retreating form of Barbara Stafford, to
which they seemed drawn by some fascination, and followed the young
girl, unconscious that he had done any thing to wound or offend her.
Elizabeth sat down in the oaken chair, that had belonged to her mother.
She could not understand the iron feelings that crept over her.
"Has that woman's shadow chilled all the love from my heart as well as
his?" she said to herself. "Am I too bewitched?"
CHAPTER XXXIV.
TOWARD THE SHORE.
This word made the idea, that had haunted her so long, painfully
tangible. The young girl began to shudder at the thoughts that crowded
upon her. All the feelings, connected with her love of this young man,
had been strange from the first. So much of pain was mingled with its
sweetness, so much of passion, temper, and the bitter tears which spring
from both, that she could not comprehend them. The very development of
her own nature, under the workings of a passion utterly unknown to her
before, had something mysterious in it, which aroused ideas of some
supernatural power, checking and thwarting it into a wild pain.
Barbara Stafford had undoubtedly connected herself with the evil power,
which sometimes held her heart girded like a vice, and again forced the
young creature to throw herself upon the woman's bosom in a paroxysm of
regretful tenderness.
Why was she to love or hate Barbara Stafford, a woman she had never seen
till within the last few weeks--a stranger wrecked upon the shore, and
cast up, as it were, from the foam of the ocean, without a history, and
it might prove without a true name. If it must be that their destinies
jostled each other, why could it not be all love or entire hate?
Elizabeth Parris sat still, thinking these things over, while Norman
Lovel was talking to her of the friends she had so lately left. He
brought a score of sweet messages from Lady Phipps, and kindly
remembrances from the governor himself. He spoke of the loneliness that
fell upon the family when its guests had departed; but after his words
to Barbara Stafford, any thing he could say to her seemed cold and
common-place. Without knowing it, Elizabeth was possessed of that proud
hunger, which every true woman feels, when she really loves--that
craving desire to be all or nothing, which makes so many noble hearts
miserable.
Yes, Elizabeth would be all to Norman Lovel, or she would be nothing.
She did not say these words, or think these thoughts; but the resolution
rose and burned in her heart like a fire. Filled with the tumult of
these sensations, she did not heed what her lover was saying. His voice
seemed to come from afar off; and as for the meaning of his speech, her
ears refused to drink it in.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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