Bildungsromans; England -- Social life and customs -- Fiction; Illegitimate children -- Fiction
Alan got a third in Greats and Michael a first in History. Michael’s
immediate emotion was of gladness that Alan had no reason now to feel
the disappointment. Then he began to wonder how on earth he had
achieved a first. Many letters of congratulation arrived; and one or
two of the St. Mary’s dons suggested he should try for a fellowship at
All Souls. The idea occupied his fancy a good deal, for it was
attractive to have anything so remote come suddenly within the region
of feasibleness. He would lose nothing by trying for it, and if he
succeeded what a congenial existence offered itself. With private means
he would be able to divide his time between Oxford and London. There
would really be nothing to mar the perfect amenity of the life that
seemed to stretch before him. Since he apparently had some talent (he
certainly had not worked hard enough to obtain a first without some
talent) he would prosecute the study of history. He would make himself
famous in a select sort of way. He would become the authority of a
minor tributary to the great stream of research. A set of very
scholarly, very thorough works would testify to his reputation. There
were plenty of archaic problems still to be solved. He cast a
proprietary glance over the centuries, and he had almost decided to
devote himself to the service of Otto I and Sylvester II, when in a
moment the thought of Lily, sweeping as visibly before his mind as the
ghost in an Elizabethan play, made every kind of research into the past
seem a waste of resolution. He tore up the congratulatory letters and
decided to let the future wait a while. This pursuit of Lily was a mad
business, no doubt, but to come to grips with the present called for a
certain amount of madness.
Alan remonstrated with him, when he heard that he had no intention of
trying for All Souls.
“You are an extraordinary chap. You were always grumbling when you were
up that you didn’t know what you ought to do, and now when it’s
perfectly obvious you won’t make the slightest attempt to do it.”
“Used I to grumble?” asked Michael.
“Well, not exactly grumble. But you were always asking theoretical
questions which had no answer,” said Alan severely.
“What if I told you I’d found an answer to a great many of them?”
“Ever since I’ve been engaged to Stella you’ve found it necessary to be
very mysterious. What are you playing at, Michael?”
“It’s imaginable, don’t you think, that I might be making up my mind to
do something which I considered more vital for me than a fellowship at
All Souls?”
“But it seems so obvious after your easy first that you should clinch
it.”
“I tell you it was a fluke.”
“My third wasn’t a fluke,” said Alan. “I worked really hard for it.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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