Bildungsromans; England -- Social life and customs -- Fiction; Illegitimate children -- Fiction
“Sometimes it’s very funny to marry a tart,” said Barnes.
Michael flushed. This was a directness of speech for which he was not
prepared.
“But when I first told you,” Michael said, “you seemed very pleased.”
“I was very pleased to find I’d evidently struck a nice-mannered
lunatic,” said Barnes. “You offered me five quid a week, didn’t you?
Well, you didn’t offer me that to give you good advice, now did you?”
Michael tried to conceal the mortification that was being inflicted
upon him. He had been very near to making a fool of himself by
supposing that his announcement had aroused admiration. Instead of
admiring him, Barnes evidently regarded him as an idiot whom it were
politic to encourage on account of the money this idiot could provide.
It was an humiliating discovery. The chivalry on which he congratulated
himself had not touched a single chord in Barnes. Was it likely that in
Lily herself he would find someone more responsive to what he still
obstinately maintained to himself was really rather a fine impulse?
Michael began to feel half sorry for Barnes because he could not
appreciate nobility of motive. It began to seem worth while trying to
impose upon him the appreciation which he felt he owed. Michael was
sorry for his uncultivated ideals, and he took a certain amount of
pleasure in the thought of how much Barnes might benefit from a close
association with himself. He did not regret the whim which had brought
them to Leppard Street. Whatever else might happen, it would always be
consoling to think that he would be helping Barnes. In half a dream
Michael began to build up the vision of a newer and a finer Barnes, a
Barnes with sensitiveness and decent instincts, a Barnes who would
forsake very willingly the sordid existence he had hitherto led in
order to rise under Michael’s guidance and help to a wider and better
life. Michael suddenly experienced a sense of affection for Barnes, the
affection of the missionary for the prospective convert. He forgave him
his cynical acceptance of the five pounds a week, and he made up his
mind not to refer to Lily again until Barnes should be able to esteem
at its true value the step he proposed to take.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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