“I used to think not; but men are stern critics, darling, and especially
when they are husbands. You will find out, one of these days, how neatly
your liege lord will detect every little objectionable trait in
your nature, and with what admirable frankness he will caution you
against--yourself.”
“I almost think I 'd rather he would not.”
“I 'm very certain of it, Lucy,” said the other, with greater firmness
than before. “The thing we call love in married life has an
existence only a little beyond that of the bouquet you carried to the
wedding-breakfast; and it would be unreasonable in a woman to expect
it, but she might fairly ask for courtesy and respect, and you would
be amazed how churlish even gentlemen can become about expending these
graces in their own families.”
Lucy was both shocked and astonished at what she heard, and the grave
tone in which the words were uttered surprised her most of all.
Mrs. Sewell had by this time taken off her bonnet and shawl, and,
pushing back her luxuriant hair from her forehead, looked as though
suffering from headache, for her brows were contracted, and the orbits
around her eyes dark and purple-looking.
“You are not quite well to-day,” said Lucy, as she sat down on the sofa
beside her, and took her hand.
“About as well as I ever am,” said she, sighing; and then, as if
suddenly recollecting herself, added, “India makes such an inroad on
health and strength! No buoyancy of temperament ever resisted that fatal
climate. You would n't believe it, Lucy, but I was once famed for high
spirits.”
“I can well believe it.”
“It was, however, very long ago. I was little more than a child at the
time--that is, I was about fourteen or fifteen--when I left England, to
which I returned in my twentieth year. I went back very soon afterwards
to nurse my poor father, and be married.”
The depth of sadness in which she spoke the last words made the silence
that followed intensely sad and gloomy.
“Yes,” said she, with a deep melancholy smile, “papa called me madcap.
Oh dear, if our fathers and mothers could look back from that eternity
they have gone to, and see how the traits they traced in our childhood
have saddened and sobered down into sternest features, would they
recognize us as their own? I don't look like a madcap now, Lucy, do
I?” As she said this, her eyes swam in tears, and her lip trembled
convulsively. Then standing hastily up, she drew nigh the table, and
leaned over to look at the drawing at which Lucy had been engaged.
“What!” cried she, with almost a shriek,--“what is this? Whose portrait
is this? Tell me at once; who is it?”
“A very dear friend of mine and of Tom's. One you could not have ever
met, I'm sure.”
“And how do you know whom I have met?” cried she, fiercely. “What can
you know of my life and my associates?”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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