Sir Robert's Fortune: A NovelOliphant, Mrs. (Margaret)
General
Sir Robert's Fortune: A Novel
Oliphant, Mrs. (Margaret)
Fiction
There seemed nothing, nothing clear in all the world but that one golden
path leading up into the sky. “Lift up the light of His countenance upon
you.” That did not mean, Lily thought, half pagan as the youthful
thinker so often is, the blessing that is life and joy, but rather that
which is consolation and calm. And it was not consolation or calm she
wanted, but happiness and delight. She wanted to be able to go out upon
the world with her arm in her husband’s and her head high, and to shape
her new life as other young women did--a separate thing, a new thing,
individual to themselves, not any repetition or going back. Standing
there in the dark corner, hidden till he could find the pony and take
her up secretly out of sight, hurrying away not to be seen by any
one--Lily’s heart revolted at these precautions, even though it had been
to a certain extent her own desire they should be taken. But, oh! it
was so different, her own desire! that was only the bridal instinct to
hide its shy happiness, its tremor of novelty and wonder. It was not
concealment she had wanted, but withdrawal from the gaze of the crowd;
but it was concealment that was in Ronald’s thought, a thing always
shameful, not modest, not maidenly, but an expedient of guilt.
Perhaps Ronald was just a little too long getting the pony; but he was
not very long. He had her safely in the little geeg, with all her wraps
carefully round her, before fifteen minutes had passed; but fifteen
minutes in some circumstances are more than as many hours in others.
Lily was very silent at first, and he had hard ado to rouse her from the
reflections that had seized upon her. “What are we going to do?” she
said out of the heaviness of these reflections, when all that found its
way to his lips was the babble of love at its climax. Was it that she
loved him less than he loved her? He whispered this in her ear, with one
arm holding her close, while Rory made his way vigorously along the
road, scenting his stable, and also the snow that was coming. Lily made
no answer to the suggestion. Certainly that murmur of love did not seem
to satisfy her. She was overcome by it now and then, and sat silent,
feeling the pressure of his arm, and the consciousness that there was
nobody but him and herself in the world, with the seductive bewilderment
of emotion shared and intensified, yet from time to time awoke sharply
to feel the force over again of that question: “What are we going to
do?” Oh, why had she not insisted on an answer to it before? The night
grew darker, the snow began to fall in large flakes. They were more and
more isolated from the world which was invisible round them, nothing but
Rory tossing his shaggy ears and snorting at the snow that melted into
his nostrils. By the time they reached the Tower, discovering vaguely,
all at once, the glimmer of the lights and the voice of Dougal calling
to the pony to moderate the impatience of his delight at sight of his
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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