"No! no! I can speak to no one else, and not even to you unless you
promise not to repeat a single word. Sometimes I am so miserable! I
never intended to marry Arthur--never for a moment; but he was very nice
to me--and I know you will be shocked, Norah, but I wanted him to go on
being attentive, and sometimes I did pretend I liked him a little bit,
when he seemed discouraged, or as if he were beginning to care less than
he used. Then that day on the river he asked me to marry him, and I
said No! I was horrified at the idea, and I tried to refuse him, I
really did, but he looked so miserable--I couldn't bear to see him. I
was quite happy for a little time after that, and when he was away I
longed for him to come back; but since then father and Miss Carr have
been so cross; there have been such worries with the house, and workmen,
and dressmakers, that I have felt sometimes as if I would give the world
to run away and hide, and never see any of them again!"
Norah sat motionless, gazing at her sister in horrified silence. Her
heart beat in quick, painful throbs--even Rex himself was forgotten in
the shock of hearing her worst fears confirmed in Lettice's own words.
Unhappy! within three weeks of her marriage, with presents arriving by
every post, the wedding breakfast ordered, the guests bidden to the
church! It was some time before she could command her voice
sufficiently to speak.
"But--Lettice! If you were happy at first, perhaps you are only
miserable now because you are tired and overdone. I think even if I
were going to marry Rex, I should feel sad the last few weeks when I
thought of leaving father and the old home, and all the rest of you. It
seems only natural. It would be rather heartless if one felt
differently."
"Do you think so, Norah--do you?" queried Lettice eagerly. "Oh, I am so
glad to hear you say that! I have said so to myself over and over
again, but I thought I ought to be happy. I have been so wretched.
That night when you thought I had toothache--"
"I know. But I was afraid it was that. But, Lettice, if you are not
satisfied it is not too late even now. You could tell Mr Newcome."
But Lettice gave a shriek of dismay. "Oh, never, never! I daren't even
think of it, Norah. The house is ready--all the furniture--my dresses--
the wedding presents! I could never, never break it off. Poor Arthur
would be broken-hearted, too, and his mother would be so angry; she
would never let Madge speak to me again. Oh, no! I feel better already
for talking to you. I get nervous, and imagine things that are not
true. I shall be very happy--of course I shall be happy. Arthur is so
kind--and the house is so pretty. Don't look so miserable, Norah dear;
indeed, indeed, I shall be all right."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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