American fiction -- 20th century; Short stories, American
After I had been there a week I began to grow alarmed. I was sleeping
and eating well and actually beginning to enjoy life. For a man in my
desperate condition that would never do. So I sneaked down to the
trolley-car station, took the car for Pineville, and went to see one of
the best physicians in town. By this time I knew exactly what to do
when I needed medical treatment. I hung my hat on the back of a chair,
and said rapidly:
“Doctor, I have cirrhosis of the heart, indurated arteries,
neurasthenia, neuritis, acute indigestion, and convalescence. I am
going to live on a strict diet. I shall also take a tepid bath at night
and a cold one in the morning. I shall endeavour to be cheerful, and
fix my mind on pleasant subjects. In the way of drugs I intend to take
a phosphorous pill three times a day, preferably after meals, and a
tonic composed of the tinctures of gentian, cinchona, calisaya, and
cardamon compound. Into each teaspoonful of this I shall mix tincture
of nux vomica, beginning with one drop and increasing it a drop each
day until the maximum dose is reached. I shall drop this with a
medicine-dropper, which can be procured at a trifling cost at any
pharmacy. Good morning.”
I took my hat and walked out. After I had closed the door I remembered
something that I had forgotten to say. I opened it again. The doctor
had not moved from where he had been sitting, but he gave a slightly
nervous start when he saw me again.
“I forgot to mention,” said I, “that I shall also take absolute rest
and exercise.”
After this consultation I felt much better. The reëstablishing in my
mind of the fact that I was hopelessly ill gave me so much satisfaction
that I almost became gloomy again. There is nothing more alarming to a
neurasthenic than to feel himself growing well and cheerful.
John looked after me carefully. After I had evinced so much interest in
his White Orpington chicken he tried his best to divert my mind, and
was particular to lock his hen house of nights. Gradually the tonic
mountain air, the wholesome food, and the daily walks among the hills
so alleviated my malady that I became utterly wretched and despondent.
I heard of a country doctor who lived in the mountains nearby. I went
to see him and told him the whole story. He was a gray-bearded man with
clear, blue, wrinkled eyes, in a home-made suit of gray jeans.
In order to save time I diagnosed my case, touched my nose with my
right forefinger, struck myself below the knee to make my foot kick,
sounded my chest, stuck out my tongue, and asked him the price of
cemetery lots in Pineville.
He lit his pipe and looked at me for about three minutes. “Brother,” he
said, after a while, “you are in a mighty bad way. There’s a chance for
you to pull through, but it’s a mighty slim one.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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