Humorous stories, American; United States -- Social life and customs -- Fiction
“Now there is one thing I ought to ask you about before I forget it. You
have been here in Silver land--here in Nevada--two or three years, and,
of course, your position on the daily press has made it necessary for you
to go down in the mines and examine them carefully in detail, and
therefore you know all about the silver-mining business. Now what I want
to get at is--is, well, the way the deposits of ore are made, you know.
For instance. Now, as I understand it, the vein which contains the
silver is sandwiched in between casings of granite, and runs along the
ground, and sticks up like a curb stone. Well, take a vein forty feet
thick, for example, or eighty, for that matter, or even a hundred--say
you go down on it with a shaft, straight down, you know, or with what you
call 'incline' maybe you go down five hundred feet, or maybe you don't go
down but two hundred--anyway, you go down, and all the time this vein
grows narrower, when the casings come nearer or approach each other, you
may say--that is, when they do approach, which, of course, they do not
always do, particularly in cases where the nature of the formation is
such that they stand apart wider than they otherwise would, and which
geology has failed to account for, although everything in that science
goes to prove that, all things being equal, it would if it did not, or
would not certainly if it did, and then, of course, they are. Do not you
think it is?”
I said to myself:
“Now I just knew how it would be--that whisky cocktail has done the
business for me; I don't understand any more than a clam.”
And then I said aloud:
“I--I--that is--if you don't mind, would you--would you say that over
again? I ought--”
“Oh, certainly, certainly! You see I am very unfamiliar with the
subject, and perhaps I don't present my case clearly, but I--”
“No, no-no, no-you state it plain enough, but that cocktail has muddled
me a little. But I will--no, I do understand for that matter; but I would
get the hang of it all the better if you went over it again--and I'll pay
better attention this time.”
He said, “Why, what I was after was this.”
[Here he became even more fearfully impressive than ever, and emphasized
each particular point by checking it off on his finger-ends.]
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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