Sometimes he doubted whether he was as unhappy as he fancied. He
searched through books to prove to himself that his case was by no means
solitary--that it was the common lot of lovers. He became an admirer of
the happy ending in novels. He sought for fiction-characters upon whose
handling of similar situations he could pattern his conduct One writer
informed him that the secret of success in love was to keep a woman
guessing; another, that with blonde women a heated courting brought the
best results, while with women of a darker complexion a little coldness
paid excellently. All this was too calculating--too like diplomacy.
He fell back on the advice of Madame Josephine: “Don’t judge--try
to understand. When a good man tries to be fair, he’s unjust.” As
an atonement for the disloyalty of his research, he sent Desire a
needlessly large box of flowers.
“It’s only two weeks, after all,” she had said. But the two weeks had
come and gone. All his plans were dependent on hers, and she seemed to
be without any. Already he was receiving inquiries from Eden Row as to
when he could be expected back. He could give no more definite answer
than when he had left; he procrastinated by enclosing press-cuttings and
talking vaguely about taking advantage of his American opportunities.
His position was delicate. He didn’t dare to use the argument with
Desire that she was his sole reason for remaining in New York; it would
have seemed like blackmailing her into returning. Meanwhile, since her
letters arrived regularly, he attributed her continued absence not to
lack of fondness, but to fear of facing up to a decision. He must do
nothing to increase her timidity.
On several occasions he visited Vashti. Each time other people were
present. He noticed that her eyes followed him with a curious expression
of amusement and compassion. At last one afternoon he found her alone.
She was curled up on the couch by the window, wearing a pale-blue
peignoir and a boudoir cap embroidered with tiny artificial roses. A
novel lay face downwards on the floor beside her, and she was playing
with the silky ears of Twinkles, who snuggled in her lap. As he entered,
she reached out her hand without rising and made a sign for him to sit
beside her.
“Twinkles is lonely, too. Aren’t you, Twinkles? We’re all waiting for
our little mistress.”
She went on smiling and playing with the dog’s ears. Slowly she raised
her eyes.
“I can guess what you’re wishing. You’re wishing that I wore a little
curl against my neck and had a beauty-patch.”
“A beauty-patch that’s a sleep-walker,” he added.
She laughed softly. “And did she tell you that? I’ve been thinking about
you--expecting to hear any day that you were sailing to England.”
He shook his head. “I’m like Twinkles. I’m waiting.”
Vashti lifted herself from the cushions and gazed at him intently. “How
long are you prepared to wait?”
“D’you mean how long till she comes back?”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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