Fluffy again! He frowned. Overbridge hadn’t wanted her--that was
Fluffy’s doing; she had taken her for protection. He didn’t like to
think of Desire’s being put to such uses. He didn’t like to think of her
being made a foil to another woman’s ill-conducted love-affair. There
was a lack of system about not knowing where you were going to sleep up
to within five minutes of getting into bed. He felt chagrined that
his imagination had been wasted in picturing her thinking of him. He
criticized Vashti for the leniency of her attitude; it was proper, if
bonds of affection were worth anything, for a mother and daughter to
be together after a three weeks’ separation. For his own lack of
consideration in keeping Desire from her mother, there was some excuse;
but for Fluffy’s---- The thing that hurt most was that Desire should
have been willing to telescope the most exalted moment of his life into
the next trivial happening, allowing herself no time for reflection.
All that day he waited with trembling suspense to hear from her; it was
not until the following morning that she called him and arranged to
go to lunch. Almost her first words on meeting were, “I’ve thought it
over.”
“Over! Was there anything?”
“Thieves must be punished. You mustn’t do it again.” Then, with a quick
uplifting of her eyes--so quick that the gray seas seemed to splash
over: “Come, Meester Deek, let’s forget and be happy.”
So he learnt that it was he who had done wrong--he who had to be
forgiven. Her forgiveness was offered so generously that it would have
been churlish to dispute its necessity. Besides, argument wasted time
and might lead to fretfulness.
In the weeks that followed a dangerous comradeship sprang up between
them; dangerous because of its quiet confidence, which seemed to deny
the existence of passion. Her total ignoring of the fact of sex made
any reference to it seem vulgar; yet everything that she did, from
the itinerant beauty-patch to the graceful frailty of her dress, was a
silent and provocative acknowledgment that sex was omnipresent.
“I wouldn’t dare to trust myself so much with any other man,” she told
him.
It was what Vashti had said: “Oh, no, I didn’t mind; but I should have
if it had been any one but Teddy.”
So he found himself isolated on a peak of chivalry, from which the old
sweet ways of love looked satyrish. Other men would have tried to hold
her hands. Given his opportunities, other men would have crushed their
lips against her sweet red mouth. Because she had proclaimed him nobler
than other men he refrained from any of these brutalities--and all the
while his mind was on fire with the vision of them. Instead, he put the
poetry of his passion into the parables of love that he told her. They
were like children in a forest, hiding from each other, yet continually
calling and making known their whereabouts out of fear of the forest’s
solitariness.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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