MRS. H. He's been waiting for me to look at him all through dinner. Shall I do it, and you can see what an idiot he looks? CAPT. G. 'But what imports the nomination of this gentleman?' MRS. H. Watch! (_Sends a glance to the Vaynor man, who tries vainly to combine a mouthful of ice pudding, a smirk of self-satisfaction, a glare of intense devotion, and the stolidity of a British dining countenance._) CAPT. G. (_Critically._) He doesn't look pretty. Why didn't you wait till the spoon was out of his mouth? MRS. H. To amuse you. She'll make an exhibition of you as I've made of him; and people will laugh at you. Oh, Pip, can't you see that? It's as plain as the noonday sun. You'll be trotted about and told lies, and made a fool of like the others. _I_ never made a fool of you, did I? CAPT. G. (_Aside._) What a clever little woman it is! MRS. H. Well, what have you to say? CAPT. G. I feel better. MRS. H. Yes, I suppose so, after I have come down to your level. I couldn't have done it if I hadn't cared for you so much. I have spoken the truth. CAPT. G. It doesn't alter the situation. MRS. H. (_Passionately._) Then she _has_ said that she cares for you! Don't believe her, Pip. It's a lie--as bad as yours to me! CAPT. G. Ssssteady! I've a notion that a friend of yours is looking at you. MRS. H. He! I _hate_ him. He introduced you to me. CAPT. G. (_Aside._) And some people would like women to assist in making the laws. Introduction to imply condonement. (_Aloud._) Well, you see, if you can remember so far back as that, I couldn't, in common politeness, refuse the offer. MRS. H. In common politeness! We have got beyond _that!_ CAPT. G. (_Aside._) Old ground means fresh trouble, (_Aloud._) On my honour-- MRS. H. Your _what?_ Ha, ha! CAPT. G. Dishonour, then. She's not what you imagine. I meant to-- MRS. H. Don't tell me anything about her! She _won't_ care for you, and when you come back, after having made an exhibition of yourself, you'll find me occupied with-- CAPT. G. (_Insolently._) You couldn't while I am alive. (_Aside._) If that doesn't bring her pride to her rescue, nothing will. MRS. H. (_Drawing herself up_). Couldn't do it? _I?_ (_Softening._) You're right. I don't believe I could--though you are what you are--a coward and a liar in grain. CAPT. G. It doesn't hurt so much after your little lecture--with demonstrations. MRS. H. One mass of vanity! Will nothing _ever_ touch you in this life? There must be a Hereafter if it's only for the benefit of---But you will have it all to yourself. CAPT. G. (_Under his eyebrows._) Are you so certain of that? MRS. H. I shall have had mine in this life; and it will serve me right. CAPT. G. But the admiration that you insisted on so strongly a moment ago? (_Aside._) Oh, I _am_ a brute!