Solitude: With the Life of the Author. In Two PartsZimmermann, Johann Georg
Philosophy
Solitude: With the Life of the Author. In Two Parts
Zimmermann, Johann Georg
Solitude
The honorable Mr. Damer, the eldest son of Lord Milton, was five and
thirty years of age when he put a period to his existence by means
perfectly correspondent to the principles in which he had lived. He was
married to a rich lady, the daughter-in-law of General Conway. Nature had
endowed him with extraordinary talents; but a most infatuated fondness
for excessive dissipation obscured the brightest faculties of his mind,
and perverted many of the excellent qualities of the heart. His houses,
his carriages, his horses, and his liveries, surpassed in splendor
and magnificence every thing sumptuous and costly even in the superb
and extravagant metropolis of Great Britain. The fortune he possessed
was great; but the variety of lavish expenditures in which he engaged
exceeded his income, and he was reduced at length to the necessity of
borrowing money. He raised, in different ways, near forty thousand
pounds, the greater part of which he employed with improvident generosity
in relieving the distresses of his less opulent companions; for his
heart overflowed with tenderness and compassion; but this exquisite
sensibility, which was ever alive to the misfortunes of others, was at
length awakened to his own embarrassed situation; and his mind driven by
the seeming irretrievable condition of his affairs, to the utmost verge
of despair. Retiring to a common brothel, he sent for four women of
the town, and passed several hours in their company with apparent good
spirits and unencumbered gayety; but, when the dead of night arrived, he
requested of them, with visible dejection, to retire; and immediately
afterward drawing from his pocket a pistol, which he had carried about
him the whole afternoon, blew out his brains. It appeared that he had
passed the evening with these women in the same manner as he had been
used to pass many others with different women of the same description,
without demanding favours which they would most willingly have granted,
and only desiring, in return for the money he lavished on them, the
dissipation of their discourse, or at most, the ceremony of a salute, to
divert the sorrow that preyed upon his tortured mind. But the gratitude
he felt for the temporary oblivion which these intercourses afforded,
sometimes ripened into feelings of the warmest friendship. A celebrated
actress of the London theatre, whose conversations had already drained
him of considerable sums of money, requested of him, only three days
before his death, to send her five and twenty guineas. At that moment he
had only ten guineas about him; but he sent her, with an apology for his
inability to comply immediately with her request, all he had, and soon
afterward borrowed the remainder of the money, and sent it to her without
delay. This unhappy young man, shortly before the fatal catastrophe, had
written to his father, and disclosed to him the distressed situation he
was in; and the very night on which he terminated his existence, his
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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