Wandering along arm in arm, they passed various contingents of the
Russians, male and female, whose scarlet blouses shone brightly under
the variegated globes of light. These exotics were happy as children,
full of fun and laughter; none more so than the young giant
Krasnojabkin, whose name had been coupled by scandalmongers with that
of Madame Steynlin. An admiring audience had gathered around him while
he performed a frenzied cancan in an open moonlit space; he always
danced when he had enough to drink. The judge looked on with envy. It
sickened him to realize that those far-famed luncheons and dinners of
Madame Steynlin were being devoured by a savage like this. And the
money he doubtless extracted from her! Presently a loud guffaw from
some bosky thicket announced that the friends had been joined by the
Financial Commissioner for Nicaragua. The Trinity was complete. They
were always together, those three, playing cards at the Club or sipping
lemonade and vermouth on the terrace.
"Oh, Mr. Keith," said the Duchess in her sweetest accents, "do you know
of what this entertainment makes me think?"
"Shall I guess?"
"Nothing of the kind! It makes me think that it is very, very wrong of
a man like you to be a bachelor. You want a wife."
"To want a wife, Duchess, is better than to need one. Especially if it
happens to be only your neighbour's."
"I am sure that means something dreadful!"
Don Francesco broke in:
"Tell me, Keith, how about your wives? What have you done with them? Is
it true that you sold them at various Oriental ports?"
"They got mislaid somehow. All that was before my Great Renunciation."
"Is it true that you kept them locked up in different parts of London?"
"I made it a rule never to introduce my lady-friends to one another.
They are so fond of comparing notes. Novelists try to make us believe
that women delight in men's society. Rubbish! They prefer that of their
own sex. But please didn't refer to the same painful period of my
life."
The priest insisted:
"Is it true that you gave the plumpest of them to the Sultan of
Colambang in exchange for the recipe of some wonderful sauce? Is it
true that you used to be known as the Lightning Lover? Is it true that
you used to say, in your London days, that no season was complete
without a ruined home?"
"She exaggerates a good deal, that lady."
"Is it true that you once got so drunk that you mistook one of those
red-coated Chelsea pensioners for a pillar-box and tried to post a
letter in his stomach?"
"I'm very short-sighted, Don Francesco. Besides, all that was in a
previous incarnation. Do come and listen to the music! May I offer you
my arm, Duchess? I have a surprise for you."
"You have a surprise for us every year, you bad man," she said. "Now do
try and see if you can't get married. It makes one feel so good."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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