She set rather indifferently about her practising that afternoon. It
seemed to be no matter whether Chopin or Mendelssohn spoke to her
soul; both were alike rendered with a cold brilliancy very far removed
from her usual sympathetic interpretation. Her thoughts were far
away, wandering amid scenes of her girlhood; a happy time, full of
social enjoyment, of affectionate family intercourse, of freedom from
care, from make-shifts, from the dishonor of debt; a dishonor that
bore lightly upon May, with his belief in the future, but that was
crushing to her sensitive nature. Idly her fingers wandered, swifter
her thoughts flew, till all at once a sentence of homely wisdom from
a modern novelist came into her mind: "Many women are struggling
under the burden of money-saving when they had far rather spend their
energies in money-getting."
She arose impetuously, her eyes suddenly full of light. What had she
been thinking of? There was a fund of unused wealth in her fine musical
education, in her beautiful voice, a little impaired by hardships, but
magnificent still. Here was the way out of all this mirage of poverty;
with what she could earn by taking a class in Madame Cable's school
combined with her husband's earnings, they could live with comparative
ease and comfort. Oh, happiness, oh, relief! Laura's hat and cape were
on in ten minutes and a car was taking her down-town to the dwelling of
her old teacher, sure of a welcome and of aid. Madame had offered her
this position five years ago, just after her graduation, but her mother
would not hear of it. Now her mother was two thousand miles away, on
a frontier post with Major McHenry, entirely ignorant of the state of
affairs in her daughter's household.
What a curiously elusive thing courage is! By the time Laura's finger
was on the bell at Madame's door, her breath was coming in gasps, and
while she waited in the lofty and handsomely furnished parlor for the
coming of her old teacher, all the strength went out of her knees, so
that she found it difficult to rise when that stately, self-possessed
woman came in with a little silken rustle of skirts and extended hand.
It is so hard to say outright to a friend, "Help me!" And yet, is not
the opportunity of giving help and comfort one of the rewards of a
successful life? Why do we distrust human goodness? It was the pride
in Laura's nature that made her talk of everything else rather than
the object of her call, that made her tongue falter and her cheek grow
paler, when at length she brought herself to her task.
But fate was not ill-disposed. It happened that Madame needed her
services. She had come at an opportune moment, and in a few minutes the
business was satisfactorily settled.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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