But the following month brought Mr. May increasing ill-luck. He would
have been a generous and kindly man if he had prospered, and with
nothing to bring it to the surface he might have gone through life, his
lack of sterling principle unsuspected. He could be generous but not
just; he could recognize the rights of others--the right of tradesmen
to be paid, the rights of his political comrades to a fulfilment of his
promises to them--_if_ everything went well with himself. But to tell
the truth in the teeth of disaster, to face an irate creditor, to climb
down from his height of vain ambition and lay to heart that vow of duty
his childish lips had uttered at his mother's knee--"To labor truly
to get my own living, and do my duty in that state of life to which it
shall please God to call me"--this was what William May had not it in
him to perform. And his wife, with her clear moral sense, her unbending
Puritan conscience, was doomed to see him fail.
It was not the loss of her money that pained her so much when on the
next pay-day she handed him her check in very pity and sorrow for
his "bad luck." It was the feeling that do what she would, work as
she might, they would never be any better off. And the still more
dreary revelation that as her energy was more feverishly applied his
diminished. The more earnest and eager she grew to pay off their
increasing debts and establish system in their ways, the more careless
he became.
She furbished up her wedding gown and made engagements to sing at
parlor entertainments. She gave private lessons. And she made money.
Some of it she handled herself, but most of it was "put in the
bank," and drawn out for a strange purpose: one she disapproved and
disbelieved in utterly, but could not positively oppose.
He was so boyishly eager about it, so confident of his success. Through
activity unprecedented and maneuverings he did not care to remember,
Mr. May had been put up for State senator from his district, and in
all the bustle of officering small meetings and petty "bossing," his
spirits were so high, and he was so good-humored and affectionate that
his wife had not the heart to tell him that this was the worst waste of
time in which he had yet engaged. For to her sane, cautious mind it was
apparent from the first that he had not the shadow of a chance of being
elected.
It happened that on the very eve of the election she was engaged to
sing at Carnegie Hall. He could not possibly spare time to take her,
and she went down alone, in a car. Her eyes were very bright and a
spot of color burned in each cheek. She was beautiful, with the beauty
of spirit that has triumphed over flesh. But a physician in the
audience whispered to his wife that that lovely woman was far along in
consumption. "And she will go quick, too, poor thing!"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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