Alabama -- History -- Civil War, 1861-1865 -- Fiction; Domestic fiction; War stories
Unwrapping the MS., she laid it with its death-warrant in a drawer,
then sat down, crossed her arms on the top of her desk, and rested her
head upon them. The face was not concealed, and, as the light shone on
it, an experienced physiogomist would have read there profound
disappointment, a patient weariness, but unbending, resolution and no
vestige of bitterness. The large, thoughtful eyes were sad but dry, and
none who looked into them could have imagined for an instant that she
would follow the advice she had so eagerly sought. During her long
reverie, she wondered whether all women were browbeaten for aspiring to
literary honors; whether the poignant pain and mortification gnawing at
her heart was the inexorable initiation-fee for entrance upon the arena
where fame adjudges laurel crowns, and reluctantly and sullenly drops
one now and then on female brows. To possess herself of the golden
apple of immortality was a purpose from which she had never swerved;
but how to baffle the dragon critics who jealously guarded it was a
problem whose solution puzzled her.
To abandon her right to erudition formed no part of the programme which
she was mentally arranging as she sat there watching a moth singe its
filmy, spotted wings in the gas-flame; for she was obstinately wedded
to the unpardonable heresy that, in the nineteenth century, it was a
woman's privilege to be as learned as Cuvier, or Sir William Hamilton,
or Humboldt, provided the learning was accurate, and gave out no
hollow, counterfeit ring under the merciless hammering of the dragons.
If women chose to blister their fair, tender hands in turning the
windlass of that fabled well where truth is hidden, and bruised their
pretty, white feet in groping finally on the rocky bottom, was the
treasure which they ultimately discovered and dragged to light any the
less truth because stentorian, manly voices were not the first to shout
Eureka?
She could not understand why, in the vineyard of letters, the laborer
was not equally worthy of hire, whether the work was successfully
accomplished in the toga virilis or the gay kirtle of contadina.
Gradually the expression of pain passed from the girl's countenance,
and, lifting her head, she took from her desk several small MSS., that
she had carefully written from time to time, as her reading suggested
the ideas embodied in the articles. Among the number were two, upon
which she had bestowed much thought, which she determined to send to
Mr. Manning.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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