Alabama -- History -- Civil War, 1861-1865 -- Fiction; Domestic fiction; War stories
"What have I to hope for--in time of eternity? Oh! none but Almighty
God can ever know the dreary blackness and wretchedness of my
despairing soul! the keen sleepless pain of my remorse! my utter
loathing of my accursed, distorted nature!" "And His pitying eyes see
all, and Christ stretches out his hands to lift you up to Himself, and
His own words of loving sympathy and pardon are spoken again to you:
'Come unto Me, all ye weary and heavy laden, and I will give you rest.'
Throw all your galling load of memories down at the foot of the cross,
and 'the peace that passeth all understanding' shall enter your
sorrowing soul, and abide there for ever. St. Elmo, only prayer could
have sustained and soothed me since we parted that bright summer
morning twenty long, long years ago. Prayer took away the sting and
sanctified my sorrows for the good of my soul; and, my dear, dear boy,
it will extract the poison and the bitterness from yours. That God
answers prayer and comforts the afflicted among men, I am a living
attestation. It is by His grace only that 'I am what I am'; erring and
unworthy I humbly own, but patient at least, and fully resigned to His
will. The only remaining cause of disquiet passed away just now, when I
saw that you had come back to me. St. Elmo, do you ever pray for
yourself?"
"For some weeks I have been trying to pray, but my words seem a
mockery; they do not rise, they fall back hissing upon my heart. I have
injured and insulted you; I have cursed you and yours, have robbed you
of your peace of mind, have murdered your children--"
"Hush! hush! we will not disinter the dead. My peace of mind you have
to-day given back to me; and the hope of your salvation is dearer to me
than the remembered faces of my darlings, sleeping here beside us. Oh,
St. Elmo, I have prayed for you as I never prayed even for my own
Murray; and I know, I feel that all my wrestling before the Throne of
Grace has not been in vain. Sometimes my faith grew faint, and as the
years dragged on and I saw no melting of your haughty, bitter spirit, I
almost lost hope; but I did not, thank God, I did not! I held on to the
precious promise, and prayed more frequently, and, blessed be his holy
name! at last, just before I go hence, the answer comes. As I see you
kneeling here at my Murray's grave, I know now that your soul is
snatched 'as a brand from the burning!' Oh! bless my merciful God, that
in that day when we stand for final judgment, and your precious soul is
required at my son's hands, the joyful cry of the recording angel shall
be, 'Saved! saved! for ever and ever, through the blood of the Lamb!'"
Overwhelmed with emotion, the pastor dropped his white head on his
bosom; and once more silence fell over the darkening cemetery.
One by one the birds hushed their twitter and went to rest, and only
the soft cooing of the pigeons floated down now and then from the lofty
belfry.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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